Pauper Dea Bukater and the 41st Hunger Games
by Majelle
Summary: Back in time to the 41st Hunger Games, where Pauper Dea Bukater, a once rich girl from district two volunteers as suicide into The Hunger Games. She stops at nothing to poison her greedy mother's and fiance's name.
1. Form!

**Hullllo! This will be the 41st hunger games, inwhich the arena will be in a five star hotel. I have ideas for two tributes, but I need more for the rest of them! Fill out this form and put it in the review spot- quick! I'll start as soon as I get upto 22 good ones! Thank you! (ps, make some fun, creative one! We're all writers here, show me you can write!)**

_Form:_

Name:

District:

Age:

Appearance:

Personality:

History:

Family/Friends:

Reaped/Volunteered? If reaped, give reaction. If volunteered give reason:

Strengths (no more than 5): Weaknesses (no less than 3 unless a career):

Alliances?:

Romance?:

Career?:

District Token:

Interview angle:

Weapon of Choice:

Strategy in arena:

_Districts to choose from (just so you remember all of 'em!):_

_District One_

Product: Luxury Goods

_District Two_

Product: Diamonds/Mining (Something important involving mining, in any case. They also produce many of the Peacemakers. Closest relationship to the Capitol)

_District Three_

Product: Machinary - Electronics and Explosives

_District Four_

Product: Fish/Seafood

_District Five_

Product: Scientific Research

_District Six_

Product: Medicine

_District Seven_

Product: Lumber and Paper Products

_District Eight_

Product: Clothing, Textiles

_District Nine_

Product: Hunters

_District Ten_

Product: Livestock

_District Eleven_

Product: Crops and Produce

_District Twelve_

Product: Coal


	2. Tributes Page

**Still accepting forms everyone! I really love the ones now! And sorry if there's random spelling mistakes in anything, my computer only has wordpad to write on, therefore no spellcheck! I'm finding gifs (from none other than tumblr) to help showcase the characters (private message me for the link to them, since i've tried everything and they can't show up on here :/), I have the links for everyone to see how everyone looks life, this is a page for all the gifs with the tributes stats, and stuff. This page is constantly changing, so come back to see it.**

* * *

><p><span>TRIBUTES:<span>

_Hanna Reede_

-District 1 Female tribute-

Age fourteen

Appearance: blonde, black eyes, goth

_Leek Hermon_

-District 1 Male tribute-

Age fifteen

Appearance: blonde hair, blue eyes

* * *

><p><em>Pauper Dea Bukater<em>

-District 2 Female tribute-

Age seventeen

Appearance: blonde, freckles, brown eyes

_Nowl Flight_

-District 2 Male tribute-

Age seventeen

Appearance: blonde, blue eyes, muscular

* * *

><p><strong>OPEN<strong>

-District 3 Male tribute-

Age thirteen

Appearance:

**OPEN**

-District 3 Female tribute-

Age fifteen

Appearance:

* * *

><p><em>Vail Hedowl<em>

-District 4 Female tribute-

Age sixteen

Appearance: blue hair, brown eyes

_Favian Brito_

-District 4 Male tribute-

Age fifteen

Appearance: black hair, violet eyes, tanned skin

* * *

><p><strong>OPEN<strong>

-District 5 Male tribute-

Age

Appearance:

_Beatrice Evans_

-District 5 Female tribute-

Age fourteen

Appearance light brown hair, light brown eyes

* * *

><p><strong>OPEN<strong>

-District 6 Male tribute-

Age

Appearance:

_Char Rubhol_

-District 6 Female tribute-

Age eighteen

Appearance: white hair, brown eyes

* * *

><p><strong>OPEN<strong>

-District 7 Male tribute-

Age

Appearance:

**OPEN**

-District 7 Female tribute-

Age

Appearance:

* * *

><p><strong>OPEN<strong>

-District 8 Male tribute-

Age

Appearance:

_Libera (Libby) Braidif_

-District 8 Female tribute-

Age eighteen

Appearance: blonde, tall, gangly

* * *

><p><strong>OPEN<strong>

-District 9 Male tribute-

Age

Appearance:

_Fienia Slyox**  
><strong>_

-District 9 Female tribute-

Age: fifteen

Appearance: red hair, brown eyes, always scowling

* * *

><p><em>Remus Night<em>**  
><strong>

-District 10 Male tribute-

Age

Appearance:

_Electra Rospher_

-District 10 Female tribute-

Age seventeen

Appearance: short blondish brown hair, big brown eyes

* * *

><p><strong>OPEN<strong>

-District 11 Male tribute-

Age

Appearance:

_Thailia Rush_

-District 11 Female tribute-

Age eighteen

Appearance: brown hair, brown eyes

* * *

><p>Artemis Hailee<p>

-District 12 Female tribute-

Age twelve-

Appearance: tiny frame, flaming red hair, freckles, green eyes.

_Jack Venustus_

-District 12 Male tribute-

Age seventeen

Appearance: brown hair, blue eyes

* * *

><p><span>IMPORTANT CHARACTERS:<span>

_Calif Prisst_

-Pauper's fiance-

Age nineteen

Appearance: beefy, blonde hair, blue eyes

_Mailis Rudry_

-District 2 mentor-

Age twenty one

Appearance: brown hair, brown eyes


	3. Chapter 1: A Psycho Plan for Pauper

**Still accepting forms!**

Chapter 1: A Psycho Plan for Pauper

My hand finds his still cradled in mine, just as it had been before I fell asleep.

My eyes stay closed a moment longer, trying to remember the dream I'd been having, it had involved a blinding flash of green light, and a cold high laugh. That seemed new. Perhaps my subconsious was now attempting to make my dreams more interesting, since was life was nothing close to.

A few moments longer and I opened my eyes to see the still sleeping blonde boy inwhich I lay facing. I move our entwained hand to punch him in the nose, for some strange reason, this is the only thing that ever wakes him up.

In all seriousness, I'm sure thunder would wake him up too, or anything remotely loud other than my voice, my voice he tunes out even in his sleep. It's no surprise since he does it so well when he's awake as well.

The punch wakes him up, and he lets go of my hand to let out a groggy groan, and itch his now sore nose.

"Food?" he questions.

I let out one laugh, keeping a sweet voice, "good morning to you, too."

His eyes flicker open, "_Pauper_," he moans, "I'm straving."

My eye brow raises and I give a small giggle, "me too, remember our deal?"

His eyebrows furrow and he closes his eyes again, remembering the deal of how he was going to treat me like, in his words, ' the princess that you should be' today because of the reaping, "tomorrow, I promise."

I laugh louder, "I might not be here tomorrow!" No, I won't be here tomorrow, if everything goes as plan, I most certainly won't be.

He will be though, as he's now just turned too old to be reaped, he is nineteen, but I still can be,_ and will be_.

He groans again, and turns so I am in no way to punch his nose again, "that's one in a million baby, just go make us food, and I will make breakfast tomorrow."

I stuck out my tongue at him for the use of the word 'baby', I had made it very clear to him that I found it utterly degarding, baby,_ ha! Am I a child to you? _On the contray, I am seventeen.

Age seems to be important, seeing as I am still young enough to be called in the reaping today. Which is not a bad thing to me. No, I am not a bloodthirsty woman, the typical types you see on television of district two. I find myself to be a rare exception, yet I still want in the Hunger Games just as bad as they would, if not more.

"Fine," I agree soelmly. I want to fight harder, yet who am I to complain? This muscular blonde boy is the boy who will save me and my mother from our certain poverty. A bit more than a year ago, my father had left me and my mother, Frances, to now fend for ourselves. He just took all the money and left us. No one is sure at all where he is, dead, in hiding, laughing at how we now struggle to maintain our high social heirarchy.

I learnt quickly to stop crying about it, my mother, on the other hand, took more drastic measures.

This is where Calif comes in, the blonde boy who begs me for breakfast is of very old money. My mother somehow, someway made us met up and 'fall in love'. A perfectly planned meeting at a dinner party at a rich friends house had me in my best, and only remaining robes that night. That night where we kissed after discussing how our futures would be perfect together, was the night I sad goodbye to my once almost pefect plan for freedom. He was the mayor's son, and my best bet for our money problems. The night I met Calif was the same he proposed to me.

I said yes knowing that it was what my mother wanted.

My plan was simple, to runaway once I was old enough, run away and marry someone poor in the district. There weren't many poor boys in the district, but the slum on the other end of the district I knew would hold my future husband. This was my life would turn away, and completley change.

My life before my father left, and after a brief moment of almost freedom was always the same. And I mean _always_. I could tell you how the rest of my life would play out,_ marry rich, attend dinner parties, gossip amongst the fellow rich ladies, hold my tongue at injust, and smile at everyone. _That life seemed to sweet my mother, but not me. I _yearned_ for adventure, and those two_ presicous _weeks after my father had left me, when I thought for sure I'd be moving into the slums, had been the best moments of my life.

But now my mother had me engaged to a man to get our money back, a man nothing like my dream man from the slums. I was back a prisoner at the dinner parties, and back to praying that I'd be picked in the Hunger Games, just for some adventure.

I move off the bed to make some breakfast, he'll have to get up soon enough, as it is mandatory to be present at the reaping.

The clock says the stylist for the reaping will be here soon, but not too soon, it seems, that I still have time to make breakfast for us and eat.

Everyone in district two loves getting dressed up for reaping day. Don't get me wrong, a pretty dress does make me feel a lot better most of the times, but it also reminds me too much of what a don't want to be, a pretty rich girl, a snob who will get everything she wants in the rest of her life forever.

My mother walks downstairs soon after I have finished showering. The people who will be prepping me for today have already set up a station to get me ready at, and I sit down on the metal chair.

"Hello darling, I hope you look radiant today," she smiles more at the people now blow drying my hair than me. She loves to show off our 'money', or should I say Cal's money.

"Hello mother, you know I will," I smile back, fakily, "and I hope you have fun watching the reaping today."

It was moreover a double entendra. My plan for today would not be fun for her to watch, but little does she know anything can happen to her beautiful 'darling'.

She, I presume, expects just as much as any mother in district two, another kid will volunteer. Kids train for year to get into the Hunger Games, kids not much unlike me. I have trained for the Hunger Games, when I was eleven, I was secretly trained by my uncle's stepson, Junis, on sword fighting. He was a couple years older than me, and made a good coach. I trainned in secret for more than a year before I became very, very good at sword fighting. But sadly, soon after that, Junis tried his luck by volunteering for the Hunger Games, and died in it. Although, he did make it very far, he was in fourth place when his ally from district two aswell gave him the kiss of death. That is to say, he loved a girl, and thought she loved him, but during that kiss she quite literally stabbed him in the back. The girl even ended up being such a harlet, she won by doing the same to both guys. My parents never did find out about this, and so I still do random trainning sessions, with no intent on actually going through with trying to win the games.

On the contray, my plan had nothing to do with winning.

After what seemed like hours, my prep was done. My mother had surved the whole time, adding random remarks on my appearing to make conversation: "I gave her my blonde hair, mine used to be that light as a child... although blame her father for her freckles and brown eyes, so _unnatural_ in this district... a shame really."

_Finally_ I looked in the mirror to see what they had done. They had curled my long hair to the side, and gave me some pretty nice makeup. Not trying to sound conceited, but the white dress feel perfectly at above knees, and the diamonds added to the neckline made me shine.

"Ah! There's my pretty baby!" I cringed inwardly at the title, but smiled and pecked my fiance.

"I love this... thank you all!" I smiled at the prep people, it took this long for me to realize that these people were probably not of the same class as me. I frowned slightly as I hoped we would be paying them enough for them to eat tonight.

Shortly after we made our way to the reaping, I closed my mouth firmly shut to make sure I wouldn't accidently say what I was thinking, because inside I was having a battle with myself._ Don't do it, don't you dare do it! Why not? There's nothing else to live for. Pauper, no, _don't._ I've already decided that I am, now shut up mind. _

Apparently I was holing my breath, because I gasped for air as Calif kissed me, he smiled, "oh baby, don't be nervous," he winked at me for reassurance, but from it I took none. We were now parting ways as I headed to the front of all of the girls. The place where all the girls waiting to volunteer usually stood.

I remembered how it was last year, three pretty girls wanted to volunteer, and almost fought to the death here to go die somewhere else. It was a muscular beast like girl who had made it to the stage first to volunteer, She didn't last very long in the game tho, died in at the battle around the corrnucopia. Strangley and luckily, there was only one girl here who seemed ready to volunteer. Oddly, she seemed very young, probably eleven. She grinned at me, showing off how she must have carved her canine teeth with diamonds to bite people. I smiled back.

Distantly I heard my name, my head snapped up instintivley. Calif and my mother were screaming frantically, trying to get my attention. I locked eyes with Calif, whos blue eyes were pleading with me. I smiled, they seemed to understand what I wanted to do now that I was waiting up front. I looked away from them and furrowed my brows, thinking of how to make it past carved teeth.

I looked everywhere but twoards the place where my mom and Calif would be, and saw that everywhere was now full. Everyone was in their best clothes, and the boys who wanted to volunteer were already pushing each other to be closet to the stairs to the stage. I looked back down at the little girl, who was still smiling at me.

Arriving on the stage was our mayor first, who hadn't been at the house all morning. He was probably preparing for this since early last night at city hall, probably slept on his couch. He looked like an older verison of Cal, blonde hair flecked with gray. He talked about the usual stuff, about the war, about our district, and diamonds. Using a lot of metaphors, he left and our mentors stood up from the seats on stage. The twenty one year old female named Mailis Rudry stood proudly next to a frail looking thirty year old male, Mailis was the one up there who had killed Junis, I let out a huff of anger at her. Junis had really been my only real best friend. Altough there were many mentors available, since the careers from two were usually the winners, these two apparently were the ones to volunteer. They addressed the crowd just like the mayor, waving and getting the crowd pumped, then sat back down. Next to stand up was the young face of our escort, a blue skinned, white haired capitol made man, a new escort for district two.

"Hullo," he called to the crowd with his thick capitol accent, "I will not waste more time, let us begin with ladies."

His hand seemed to go into slow motion as he reached into the glass, "Rosanna Rotcher!"

The girl with the teeth dropped her jaw, and I saw the look of comprehension dawn on her at what this meant. I could volunteer, and she wouldn't have a say in it. She walked up the steps, glaring at me to let her have this. I waited until she had the top step when I began to move, "I volunteer!" I cried.

The crowd when silent except for Calif screaming "NO!" and my mother wailing. _They don't care,_ I think. After a second pause, the town all explodes in applause.

I turned my head to see no one else volunteering. I smiled and wanted to laugh, the blue skinned man was now calling "Poka Rotcher!" when everything seemed to go into an extreme, unnatural silence. My mind had just dawned that my plan has worked. I would finally die in the Hunger Games, I would save a life by suicide. I would met a sweet escape to escape my prison that is my life.


	4. Chapter 2: The Goodbye Kiss

**I am still completly accepting more forms! I've made up a bunch on my own, but I really want everyone else into the story! I know you have good ideas, so just add them in!**

No turning back now.

Apparently in all my preplanning on how to volunteer, my mind never once thought how I'd feel once I did it. It felt like every bone in my body was protesting my stupidity, I tried to remind myself over and over again that death would be a sweet, welcomed escape.

They had escorted me to the justice builing, in a rather large room with two plush chairs facing each other. I didn't care who'd come see me, I didn't want to see my mother crying now that I've thrown away her only chance for money, and I didn't want to see Cal pretending like he loved me.

And I know that he's pretending. All I've ever been to him is another pretty thing money bought him, something to show off at parties, and something to have people jealous of. At first, I surprisingly didn't think that. I thought that by miracle I had found an exception to all the uninteresting boys that money produced. Calif seemed fun, adventureous even. We used to sneak out a lot from when me and my mother first moved into the mayors house, we'd break the curfew the capitol gave us to just sit by the lake and talk.

That was until our talking began to turn into constant compliments on my appearance, on how anyone would be lucky to have a girl like me. I didn't like it, I'd always been told this and it made me feel uglier every time_. I'm more than just my looks, you know. _I would say sweetly, but he would merely respond with, a laugh and a kiss.

The oak wood doors slid open to let my mother enter. She was without Calif- apparently they'd be taking turns.

Her eyes were red from tears that she had shed at the reaping, but she wasn't crying now. No, the expression on her face was a sneer, "_why_?" she demanded, sitting down on the chair oppisite mine.

I blinked, I also hadn't thought of how I'd say my goodbyes. "Er- why not?"

Her sneer still stayed on her face, "after all of what I did to help us, you through it all away!"

"Help us? Mother don't be silly, it's you who you're helping, I'm merely a pawn." I raised my eyebrows, testing her.

I have told my mother on three seperate occasions that I do not want to marry Calif, but her respone every time is the same, it's the best for us. Us. My happiness meant nothing if she was happy. That's how it'd always been.

"A rich life is better than any other!" Mother clenchs her fists.

"A boring life than is better than any kind of adventure? Mother, that's stupid. You've had you're chance to live your life now _let me live mine_!" Our voices now raised.

"_Let you live yours_?" She sneered, "_fine_! Live the next few weeks of your life! That's all there is now that you've done this!"

"A few weeks of freedom beats a lifetime of prison!" I spit.

"Prison? You don't know what it's like to live otherwise. Poor is prison!"

"The weeks I spent poor I made it out complelty fine, _I was happy with nothing_. I survived."

There was then a knock on the door, signalling our that our time was up. I smiled to my mother, waiting for my chance to get the last words in.

She stood up and strod over to the door, then paused turned to stare at me with pierecing eyes, and uttered a low demand: "do not poison my name in that arena, die gallantly or win and bring us back our money and dignity."

"I will do one of what you said." I told her right before she closed the door.

I stayed seated in my chair, anger coursing threw me, shaking my hands, I awaited my next arrival.

I was not surprised to see Calif's blonde beefy head entering next. His face was set in a grimace as he walked over to where I sat, instead taking a seat beside me, making me turn twoards him. I moved to sit crossed legged, feeling mixed emotions about this.

It wasn't exsactly Calif's fault that he was everything I loathed. All in all, he was actually nice to try and save me, a warm feeling of unexpected sadness came over me as I looked him in his blue eyes.

"_I hope you die there_," he said this slowly, sending chills down me.

"Why?" I asked shocked.

"_Why_?" he sneered, "this looks horrible on me, Pauper. You have embrassed me too much, and all you have going for you is your looks."

I laughed. I just couldn't think of anything to do other than laugh. I was going to die there anyways, but this just made me want to live, or even better, drag him in the arena and kill him.

Suddenly I felt his hands on the side of my face. I tried to back up, but was unsuccessful, I looked him in the eyes, which was now filled with a deep hate.

"I can just kill you now..." he whispered softly.

My eyes widened at these words. I wanted to die in the place of another, not like this. The Hunger Games would be where I would die, I panicked, pleading with my eyes, unable to speak out of fear.

But if he was going to do it, he would have done it already, so I did the unthinkable, and apparently my new signature reaction, I grabbed his face in my hands and pulled him in for a kiss.

Shocking he kisses back and I realized that I'm safe. But this kiss feels spolied, spolied from the memories of how much this boy has set me back in life. All the ambitions I had he took from me, or belittled, all the times he would call me nothing more than pretty. I wanted this kiss to end, but he didn't. He was getting to into it, pushing himself down onto me.

This goes on until thankfully I hear the knock at the door signally our time begin up. We end our poisoned kiss.

"I love you," he says, this makes me want to laugh, a boy about to kill me is now in love with me, but I think of nothing else to do other than smile.

But in my mind, I'm thinking of nothing other than the revenge I want on him, to show him that I was way more than just my looks, so I smile and say simply, "my token is our wedding ring."

He leaves the room confident, but one thing is now certain from these encounters. I would die at the right moment, I would show my mother how I can handle myself not being rich, and I will show Cal that I am way more than just a pretty face. I would poison my mother and Calif with the wedding ring.


	5. Chapter 3: Fire Dancer

**Still flipping accepting forms! And sorry if this chapter isn't up to par- I wrote it at 11:25 at night to not be scared, but now my friends, I will reread Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix for the third time. **

Rain hit the hot pavement, encircling the town in a mist that created a pessimistic foreboding.

The trains that took the tributes to the Capitol seemed to have the mist so dark around it, that it felt like another world. This morning at the reaping it had been fairly nice out, yet without warning the weather hit a peculiar state.

I swallowed the fear inside me, I became conscienatly aware that the cameras are now all on me, so I turn the fear into a smile, but I assume that it just comes out looking like a sour grimace. I tried not to play with my lips- a nervous tendency that has always been with me- but the feeling of them was so tempting at this moment. My lips were unnaturally big, and right now I welcomed the unnatural.

Turning twoards the entrance of the train, I see Cal getting on the train. I stopped dead in my tracks. _No, impossible_. My mind tries to find a quick conclusion by searching the enormous crowd of people seeing us off, I panic when I can't see him, in fact, I don't even see my mother. It's as though she got on the train before hand.

"Er- we're about to leave," a voice from the door has me wipping my head around in panic, the person who spoke was leaning against the entrance to the train. Fortunately, this person must have been who I though was Calif. He had the same shade of blonde hair, and same muscular body, but other than that, this boy had dark green eyes, and was rather tall and gangly looking. "Stop looking at me like that and get on the train, bird."

His talking broke me out of gaping at him. I titled my head sideways as I made my way to the train, eyes locked on his, "bird?" I repeat.

"Everyone used to call girls birds in England, way, well, very way back in the day," he frown, "shame it stopped."

"Who are you?" I furrow my brow, surely this man wasn't on stage when I had volunteered, why would he be coming on the train than? "Are you sneaking aborad?"

"Sneaking aborad?" he laughed, "brillant idea, but no, I volunteered."

It seemed that it the glory of accomplishing my plan, I did not see who had taken the place for the sharp toothed girl's brother. The train strated forwards, sending me stumbling into the wall.

"You're cute, I'm Nowl Flight," he offered his too long arm for a shake, I took it and replied, "Pauper Dea Bukater."

"I know who _you _are," he laughed, "you're quite famous in the district, birdy."

"F-famous?" I studdered, and laughed, "for what?"

"For what? The fire dancer, that's what everyone calls you. I like 'bird' better though."

I blinked, then comprehension dawned on my face_. Fire dancer_ was the title I won when I spent those two and a half weeks in poverty alongside my mother. We had lived in a small house in the slums, my mother, who was then without my knowlegde gone to varies socials in facade that she still was wealthy, spent most of the time out and leaving me to fend for myself. Not that I minded, it was the escape my life needed, and us slumdogs, we spent our days surviving, but by nights, we were unleashed. It all happened very quickly. One day, within the second week of my new found poverty my mother had gone to the Smitherson to try and get some of their money, while _I_, I was doing much more adventurous things. The first part was the robbery. I had made many friends in the slums, a tanned tall boy, a graceful yet strong girl, and I had one night made our way for our usual rounds. We went by day to the diamond mines, and stealthly stole diamonds to sell for food. We wanted stole what we couldn't afford, but since that was everything we knew we couldn't, _take only what won't be noticed_. The stealing had to happen in the day time, as miners were careless about their large bins of diamonds, but the peacekeepers weren't at night. Me, and boy and the girl had stolen an entire months worth of food, in the form of diamonds that we'd sell that day, the second part was the celebration later that night. We entered our own party late, pockets full of our goods. The party was made up of all the kids old enough to be in the Hunger Games that lived in the slums, we had sort of like a campfire, but this campfire involved dancing and singing.

It happened too quick, I had placed my diamonds next to the fire to begin my festives, I turned around, and everyone's eyes were on me.

Not the good on me, for horror struck their lips, and a young girl had managed to scream to alert everyone around us.

I turned quick to see the diamonds I had placed down had bursted into flames. Flames had cought on the black cuffs I had around my ankles, and in a panic I had done was seemed sane at the time, I had started to move my feet in the air to remove the fire from me.

Everyone around me stayed still, still frozen in panic, but the same girl who screamed called out, "_she's dancing_!"

I guess it looked like I was, but really I was just trying to get the fire off of me, and it was working so right- until I had an idea to beat the fire with the palms of my hands. The fire had spread to the palms of my hands, and I knew then that these diamonds were laced with oil, as the oil would be all over my hands from carrying them.

The peacemakers must have covered the diamonds with oil, seeing as theives would take off with their diamonds. But at the moment I really didn't care, I continued to fly in the arm, feet not touching the ground until I was sure they were out, and then moved away from the fire onto my hands.

I gathered all the breath I could and then blew on both hands, and the fire grew huge, soaring twoards the main fire pits, in attempt to get it off me.

But that wasn't coming off, and panic overroad my brain until for the third time, the girl spoke, "it's not _burning_ her."

And I stopped and looked up and the little girl, and then looked down at my palms. No burns. No pain.

"Magic!" "Witch!" "Kill her!"

With each scream filling the air I trembled, this was a mistake.

"Wait!" the graceful girl whom I had travelled with earlier to steal stepped forwards, and held out her hand, "look!" he grabbed my hand and fire transported in hers, she didn't look painned ethier.

"It's just a warning," I said quickly, seeing that the oil protected our skin from the fire, "they know about us stealing, we- we can't anyone."

Everyone just stood there in silence, knowing what this meant, no more food to eat. Stravation. Slowly everyone began talking, then complaining, than panic rose in people's voices. It was a well planned night gone wrong, I felt sorrow fill me, but it was soon followed by an idea.

I blew my fire hands into the sky to stop the chaos, which silenced everyone.

"It is the end of stealing diamonds, but the beginning of more diverse robbers," I yell, "we will steal from the rich to live."

Everyone took a bit to understand, but during my next few days there, it seemed like I lead a battle group. We stole from party goers and at socials, always some, but not all to not be noticed. We were well fed now, and surivived.

I sighed, "I like bird better too."

"It didn't hurt though, did it?"

"No. But I really don't like fire now, c'mon, let's get some sleep."

It's a short train ride to the capitol, and I understand that tomorrow I will truely met with my mentor and escort during breakfast on the train, so tonight's my one night I have to think this over. To think of my new plans for these games, and to think of survival. So as I lay in bed I try to think of my strengths, and weaknesses, but my mind blanks. It grows darker as later and later I try to come up with plans, I have always been so good with making plans, but nothing comes to mind. So instead I think about today, and think that now's my only chance to cry before I will be montered constantly by cameras, so I try, but like plan making, it doesn't work. I think of every sad thing in the world and squint my eyes for tears to start, but none do. It must be because I've already accepting my death, why should I bother caring?


	6. Chapter 4: The Stealth Nowl Flight

I was so relieved to be away from Calif and my mother that I spelt dreamlessly, in contrast, Nowl woke me up twice screaming in his sleep. From what I understood, he regreted leaving his family to join the Hunger Games. My mind woke me up early, telling me it was time to make breakfast, once I opened my eyes and remembered where I was, I laughed. I would no longer have to make him breakfast ever again.

But now that I was thinking of food, my stomach rumbled; it seemed too soon that I'd have to met Mailis, my new mentor, in person. She had won the Hunger Games two years ago, killing what seemed to be my only true friend, my uncle's stepson, and my former trainer, Junis. It wasn't that I didn't understand that the Hunger Games were unfair- infact, I understood it more than most in district two- it was that meeting the victors in person always seemed to really unnerve me.

Why should I care anyway? I'm already a dead woman, I should be over pointless worring. This was my resolve as I got dress and ready for breakfast.

Our train would be arriving in the Capitol around noon, seeing a district two was so close, therefore I dressed in what I assume would be my own funeral outfit. A short black dress ending in lace, with long sleeves also ending with lace. I even wore a making lace headband. I thought with a bang of sadness that no one would be there for my funeral. Even after they bring my body to district two, Cal and my mother wouldn't go. Calif might have, but after what I'll do to tarnish our love in the arena, I think he'd be more likely to show up later, to spit on my tombstone. Me dressing for my own funeral gave me an odd sense of foreboding, sending a big shiver up my spine.

"Coming to breakfast bird- oh sorry," Nowl had appeared leaning against my door frame, he added the sorry since his silent feet had quieted his arrival and made the shiver look like a convolsion.

I tried to giggle it off, "yeah, I guess I'm ready now."

We made pointless chatter until we reach the breakfast cart of the train. Only our escort, the blue skinned, white haired capitol man was in the room on wheels. Me and Nowl sat down next to each other, seeming to make a subconsious agreement that we were acciqentices. I looked at the blue skinned man and smiled, "I'm sorry, I must have missed your name at the reaping,"

"It's Ako Xeno," he returned my offer of a smile with something I guess was a smile from him. His mouth went creepily square, but it was a nice gesture anyways.

All too soon, Mailis Rudry made her way into the breakfast cart, a smile on her would be pretty face. She was something the people of district two thought was unnatural, for she was a brunette with brown eyes, while most genes of the district produced blonde hair babies with blue eyes. I was halfway normal, my eyes were a chocolate brown. My female eyes scanned her body for something to hate, coming up short with only a scar on her calf.

"Hello," she had such a teethy smile it reminded me of the little girl at the reaping trying to show all of her teeth to me.

Ako and Nowl said a hello back, while I formed my mouth into a tight line.

"Already hate me, huh?" she sat down across from Nowl, who turned his now puzzled face at me.

"Can you give me reason not too?" I smiled for a second.

"It was life or death, Pauper. Something you should get used too."

Nowl had turned his face back to his food, and a silence filled the table broken only by the clanging of forks hitting plates. My mind tried to think of a clever thing to say, but it only wrapped around me telling them that life or death was nothing to me, since I was always choose death. Since my stragety was too keep this known only to myself, I tighten my mouth.

Ako was the one who finally broke the silence, "in this for the fame, then?" he had asked both me and Nowl.

Thankfully, Nowl anwsered first, "it seems so."

Ako turned to me, and all I could think of saying was, "something like that."

"Mysterious, hmm. Mailis, you'd do good taking my advice, give her the mysterious angle."

"Why, Ako, I think she'd take that angle even without my advice, not that she'd listen to mine."

The discussion of angles gave my stomach a knot. I did not want to think about the games at breakfast, at least not my role in them. How could I when the only things that mattered to me in them was posioning Cal and my mother's name, while dying for some random person?

We finished our breakfast in silence, then I returned to my room just to not be in the same room as Mailis. I sat down on the comfy single bed, and thought about what Mailis had said about life or death. Would I kiss someone, than stab them in the back if my goal was winning? I furrowed my brows, but the only conclusion I could make was no, since death would be welcoming.

"Thinking? Whoa, sorry-"

"Jesus! Nowl!"

Nowl's voice had me once again startled, this time resulting in me catching myself before I almost fell off my bed. He had even had time to open the door and sit on my bed before I noticed him by his talking. He was clearly trying to hold in a smirk, but that really didn't bother me, I really welcomed this interesting life I was forming in the Hunger Games.

Nowl and I stayed chatting pointlessly until our train arrived in the Capitol.

But from our pointless conversations I was beginning to learn a lot about Nowl Flight. He was like many people in district two, who have trainned very young just to have glory in the Hunger Games. Living in the victor's village was an ambition his father wanted for himself, but never had actually volunteered. In his own shame, it seemed that Nowl's father has pushed his dreams onto his son, who was rather reluctant about having them as his own. I also noticed little things about him, things that gave me an odd feeling of hope in my navel. He was very light on his feet, startling me constantly whenever he talked because I hadn't seen him come into the room. He liked too read a lot, apparently he picked up a lot of hints on winning the Hunger Games from books with titles such as 'How to Make Friends and Influence People', '10,001 Horrible Things to do to Your Enemy', and 'Fred's Big Book of Jokes'. I asked why the joke book, and he said making people laugh were his thing, and it might just keep him alive. He also knew all bird calls and you tell you each breed within a second. After thinking long and hard about it, the Nowl Flight seems like a person worth dying for.

But as much as I know knew about Nowl, I'm sure that he knew little about me. I told him about how my father left, and told him about the weeks I spent living in the slum, which he already seemed to know a lot about both. I told him that I read too, but fiction was were my heart lied (as it was an escape for me from my miserable life, something I didn't mention to him). I told him the story about Junis' death, something he watched on television, and was surprsingly hurt about too, because he had known Junis from archery class. I told him how I was engaged to Calif, yet how I secretly hated him. I told him about my mother forcing me into this sort of arranged marriage, but there was the one big thing I left out. He had asked why I volunteered, but I weaseled my way out of it. I didn't want to tell Nowl that the Hunger Games was my suicide, the most noblest suicide ever thought of, I reckon.

The train slowed into the station, and me and Nowl smiled to eachother than stood up, welcoming what was now coming up a little less nerves, because now we both had made a new friend to journey through this game with. It's a shame that, little did Nowl know, I would


	7. Author's Note

**IN DIRE NEED OF TRIBUTES, i've taken up to making some, but I would really love if everyone showed me how creative they are and wrote! So c'mmoooon, in the next chapters Pauper will be meeting them!**


	8. Chapter 5: You Sparkle, Bird

"We should give her pink hair!"

"No! Blue!"

"Or white, like_ diamonds_!"

"Diamonds are clear, Riker."

As my stylist team fought over which color to dye my hair, I tried to picture each, and they weren't a happy picture. I have always been blonde, and I find it almost an insult to change it.

"Keep her hair as it is," my three stylists dropped silent as someone new had joined the room. I would have assumed that she was as light on her feet as Nowl since I didn't hear her enter the room, but now that she's walking twoards me it's obvious that the voices of my stylists fighting must have drowned out her very heavy footsteps, caused by the very hair heels she adorned.

"But Paprika, there's nothing else for us to do," whined the stout girl who wanted me with pink hair. I tried to be happy with all these compliments, but they only reminded me about the ones I had recieved from Calif, which came right before he said that looks were all I had on me.

"Than your job is done, leave us," and the three stylists gave a longing look at me, but left the room without protest. It became very clear that Paprika was a born alpha. She was dressed in very high heels, something the Capitol seems to deem sexy, and paired them with a dress that was the exsact colors of outter space, complete with metal rings that looked like frozen holahoops encircling the dress. She was surveying me with a look on her face that I hoped was good when she said, "how are you feeling?"

I had misread the look on her face- it had been pity, a look I haven't had the pleasure of having since I was poor. Her question had me taken aback, so I answered very honest, "er- disgruntled, I hate compliments."

She went back to surveying me again, "then I will give you none. Such a shame when people posion a compliment, isn't it?"

I nodded, then it became silent for a few minutes. I took this time to wonder what she's put me in. Our district's main purpose was mining, and over the past Hunger Games stylists very much preferred dressing everyone full of jewels. But our district also made weaponry, and peacekeepers, though district two tributes have never been put in a peacemaker costume- what kind of sponsers would that attract?

"I will go and get your dress," and Paprika left. In her absense I thought about how Nowl was taking being styled, and was hoping that nobody touched his blonde hair. She came back soon with a hint of a proud smile on her face, and a dress bag.

She unzipped it, and my jaw dropped. There was no other words for this but a wedding dress. I wanted to cry, it was so beautiful. The strapless dress looked like a traditional wedding dress, corset and poofy bottom, but the color was very not. It was black, a beautiful black that made me love it so much more, embelzed with diamonds in all the right places. Diamonds cut to looks like flowers were seen all over the dress, "this isn't even the best part," Paprika was becoming more proud by the look on my face, "we are adding the diamond flowers to places on your body. We're going to stick them mostly to one side of your forehead, coming down to your neckline, than fading. Also many in your hair."

I smiled for the first time since entering the Capitol, "hurry up and get it on me!"

It took a long time before Paprika finished me. Even my eyeshadow had some small diamonds on it, on both eyes she added diamonds that grew to look like wings, the left side's meeting up with the diamonds that stuck to my skin. She added diamonds all over my arms too, closer together on my hands, but fading out until one or two reached my collar bone. The black looked beautiful with my pale skin and blonde hair, I turned to Paprika and whispered, "thank you."

She had tears in her eyes, "you are welcome."

She led the now bedazzled me down the hall of the Captiol building that I would be living at for the next few weeks. We walked very slow, and as heavy as the diamonds were, I didn't care. I felt excited to be showing myself off to the world. A door a few whiles down opened, and a woman, almost identical to Paprika walked out, followed by a man in a black suit, full of diamonds on him aswell.

"You sparkle, bird," the man in the black suit was none other than the boy Nowl, I smiled at him, "if I were a raven I'd be all over you."

We laughed, and our stylists embraced each other, "Paisley, we are geneous," said Paprika. They let go of their embrace and I startled. It looked as thought somebody had took and cloned my stylist, because Nowl's stylist, Paisley looked identical to her.

"Twins," Nowl whispered, coming to a more logical solution than cloning.

"Ahh," I smiled.

Too soon we will be escorted downstairs, where we will met the other tributes. _Which one will kill me? _I think, but I know the better question is, _which one is worth dying for?_


	9. Chapter 6: Mailis' Tale

**I am still accepting forms, thought I'm really doubting any more will be coming :/ Oh well, I've improvised, so I hope you at least enjoy reading this! Oh, and I again remind you that the spelling mistakes are because I don't have a wordperfect, only a wordpad with no spell check. Alas, earwax.**

Walking with the ten pounds of diamonds on us, we turned up late to the chariot rides, thus checking out the other tributes was limited. Paprika and Paisley, our stylists, ushered me and Nowl onto our chariots, where they told us words of wisdom for getting sponsors.

"Smile, and sell yourselves!" Paisley demanded. My time in the Hunger Games may be very short so sponsors aren't a big deal, in fact, I would rather not have any sponsors, as they could use their money on a more deserving tribute, but I looked at the diamond faced Nowl Flight, and realized that smiling and selling myself isn't just for my benefit. And hey, Calif and my mother will be watching, maybe I can have some fun with it?

Thousands of ideas popped into my mind, each more name posioning than the last, but all too soon the district one's chariot was heading out. I peered over the horses' heads that were to be pulling my chariot to see the tributes of district one. It was a given that districts one and two always pared up and became tributes, but until I met these people, I would not classify them as my allies. The back of the head of the female tribute for district one showed me that she was blonde, but rather short. The way she carried herself told me that she was feeling a lot like myself, if I didn't know these withdraw features from seeing them in the mirror, I would easily mistake her for a rather tough girl. They had her dressed in a long and flowing red dress, which she seemed to be crossing her arms about, in contrast, her partner seemed rather cheerful. He had dirty blonde hair and was waving franticly to the crowds, as though each person in the crowd was his best friend.

In the minute I had before my chariot set out, I tried to get a glimpse of the district three tributes, but their palmino horses blocked them from view.

And then we were off, out of the dark building of chariots and into the bright light of the Capitol. Thousands upon thousands of people came to see this parade of death. I've always found it rather amusing that the folks of the Capitol, who have never had to participate in the gruesome bloodbath known as the Hunger Games, took the games like a fun television show. Although, who was I to talk? I never was really bothered by the Hunger Games until Junis died in them.

But now was not the time to feel sad and think of Junis, now was the time to smile, and as Paisley had demanded, sell myself. And so I did, not paying attention to anything else but having the biggest smile on my diamond filled face, I smile and waved to the crowd. Once during the what seemed to be a very short chariot ride, my eyes caught with Nowl's blue ones, and we both broke into a laugh which was pointless, but I milked the laugh for all it was worth to the crowd by swinging my head back.

We arrived shortly back in the building, or at least what felt like shortly, seeing as we paraded our way throw a wide streech of the Capitol. We were the second to arrive and the girl from district one was already making her way out of the room where the chariots where arriving. I frowned at her, usually district one folk where over confident and snobbish, but she seemed to be the oppisite.

The other chariots arrived soon afterwards, and dispite my earlier attempt at checking out the competition, now all I wanted to do was close my eyes and run it. Something just hit me, like when I accidently walk into my dresser, but the thing that hit me hurt worst. All of these people, these nameless people who have families and loved ones, and stories to tell, stories most won't ever get to tell. I just wanted to hug all of them and cry, but not only would my strong will not let me cry, but I'm sure that there's only a few here that want to hug. Therefore, sucking in these terrible emotions, I strained my eyes only to stay on the floor, but all too shortly I was called upon:

"Some of these gents look fierce, bird," my eyes drew up to Nowl's so I wouldn't have to look anywhere else.

"I don't want to look," I mummered.

Nowl frowned, apparently not hearing what I had to say, "the girl from district ten, I want her."

I wanted to laugh at him, he was staring mouth gaping, I followed his intrigued eyes to a girl who was clearly from district ten. She was dressed in a cow outfit, but making the best of it by laughing at herself with a few tributes. She had big brown eyes and short brown hair, with blonde highlights. She looked my age, I frowned, but once I had seen her, my not wanting to look became 'curiousity killed the cat'. The people around her varied in age; there was a blue haired girl holding a trident and wearing a rather poorly made mermaid outfit, obviously from district four, she looked about fifteen, a tall gangly blonde girl with fabric drapped around her (assuming she's from the clothing/textile district, eight) stood still laughing at the cow's joke. She had to be the oldest, she looked around eighteen. My eyes then turned to a boy who looked to be my age, he had perfect brown hair that he styled into a shag, and was pretty tall. He seemed to sense my gaze, for he looked up, gave me a look, then winked.

My eyes shot to the floor, and moving them back up again a second later to resume my curious gaze, I saw that the winking boy must be from district twelve, for he was covered in coals, now laughing at his costume compared to the cow girl's. My eyebrows furrowed as I saw a little girl, around the age of eleven standing a few feet outside the circle of laughing people. This little girl seemed to be the female tribute from twleve, covered in coal aswell. She had flaming red hair, and looked longingly at the group, as though she wanted nothing but to be in there laughing alongside them.

My gaze shot back to Nowl, who was still gaping at the cow girl. I giggled at his face, and slapped him lighty, causing him to jump.

"Hey-" he looked like he wanted to get made at me, but saw the smile on my face, and surprisingly slapping lightly me back.

I pretended that it hurt a lot more than it did, which made Nowl apologize frequently as we made our way back to our rooms. After the fourty first time I stopped him, which a big smile on my face, and told him that I got him, he looked like he wanted to slap me hard, but all he could say was "_fly away, bird_!" which had us both laughing even more. It was before supper that night that it really hit me again; these people who she had just seen laughing were most likely all going to die. A sob slipped my lips, but once that stopped more came. I knew this though, I knew that if I let myself cry I wouldn't stop. It'd be so hard to put back on the facade that I worked months and months builing, of the tough girl that never cried. I had shoved every feeling of sorrow back into my self before, and now it was coming back with a venegence. I fell on my knees to the floor, thinking how sad everything is now, and how the girl in the cow suit shouldn't die.. that Nowl and her would be perfect together.. that if only they could marry and live happily, but they can't.. no one can.. the boy who winked at me will a contender.. and the little girl will go out quickly.. so much death..

I had my arms wrapped around my waist, on my knees crying on the floor, and feeling pathetic. I cried until no tears came anymore, and by that time I became angry. Angry at district thirteen for trying to raise against the Capitol, angry at the Capitol for giving them a reason to rebel, angry at my dad for leaving, angry at whoever the fuck came up with the idea to pin child on child in a fight to the death, and angry at the lamp, which made me get to my feet, and smash it.

"They're an ugly shade of red anyway," I jumped at the noise of an unwelcomed guest. The woman's voice belonged to no other than Mailis Rudry, my mentor, "I was told to come get you for dinner," she answered my glare.

Mailis gave me a long, hard stare, and I clenched my fist, the anger now switching from the broken lamp to her.

She finally broke the silence by sighing, stepping over the broken red ceramic, and sitting on my bed, I raised an eyebrow at her, _can't she see my clenched fist longing for her jaw?_ The same jaw she used to kiss Junis with while she killed him.

"Listen.." she began, "just listen,"

I furrowed my brows then moved over to lean against the vanity desk, as much as I wanted to sit on my bed, I thought better against begin near her. For some weird reason I wanted to listen to her, I know that there's always two sides to ever story, and my angry is slowly calming down to shame.

"I was in the Hunger Games two years ago with Junis,"

"I already know this,"

"I said listen, the story has to start somewhere," she started back up again, shifting into a more comfortable position, "I was in the Hunger Games two years ago with Junis. Me and him, we trained together, made alliances together, and stayed up all night planning for everything that could happen. We became best friends, insperable so much that our stylists moved us into the same room so that we wouldn't complain about missing each other. I was too quickly falling for this boy who had once trainned me too, in sword fighting. And then the games began, you watched it, you saw how we became careers, and how our alliance was made up of four boys and me. It wasn't my first time seeing death up close, when a district nine hunter girl snook up and killed one of my alliance, but it was the first time it really sunk it. That night as I shared a tent with Junis, I spent the whole night crying in his arms, and told myself that no matter what, I'd make it out of here alive. I was scared, terrified of death. I was such a coward, I began planning against my alliance, but admist my planning I couldn't think of a way I could kill Junis without begin the one to kill him. I thought of setting the alliance on him, and running, but then I would have to live on my own in the forest, and I knew that surviving on my own wasn't one of my strong points. As my ideas on how to survive this game became more wild, more people died. Everyday there was always canons going off, and finally we were down to me, Junis, the other two remaining boys of my alliance, and that stupid girl from district nine, and I knew that as soon as we killed that girl, I would be next. So I was afraid, and stupid, and at that time did not welcome death. I lured Junis off for a walk, away from the others where I kiseed him, and well, you saw. But what you didn't see was that I broke me. I don't ask for sympathy, I'm glad you hate me as much as I hate myself. So I came back to camp and told the two remaining boys that the girl from nine attacked us, and was comforted immensely by one of the boys. I shared his tent that night, and in the morning, told him that since I returned empty handed yesterday that it was a prime idea to find food for us today. So with the one boy guarding the camp, I set off and killed him. I ran back to camp, crying, saying how that _stupid_ girl from nine must be watching our every move, for she killed him too. The dumb boy I was remaining with didn't even suspect me, I was such a good lier. I shared his tent that night, but he wasn't as easy as the guy before me. So it was in his sleep that I woke him up by startling him, and kissing him. He kissed back, and I stabbed his in the back of the head. The girl from nine was chased into my camp by mutts, and I just threw the knife that had killed my love, and my alliances, I closed my eyes before it hit her."

This whole time I wasn't staring at Mailis, I tried to imagine me in her position, and when her story ended, I finally looked up. She sounded so sad and hurt that I really shouldn't have been so surprised to see her crying. The second I got over the shock, I went up and hugged the crying girl, knowing that she was now doing what I had done earlier. She had held this tears in for so long that they were impossible to stop.

"I don't want your pity," she said threw tears.

"Yes you do, everyone needs to be comforted, "I hugged her tighter, "you can brake a lamp too."

She laughed at my sad attempt for a joke, then her face grew stern even though tears still came, "you and get your protein, I'll stay here, but you need to eat, you have training tomorrow."

I looked up and her and for a second time raised my eyebrow, all I could think of saying was "fine than," I made it stepping over the broken lamp to the door when I turned around to say, "oh, and give Nowl the sponsor gifts," I looked down, "I know we'll get about since we're a career district, but I don't plan on living very much longer, it'd be a waste."

And with that I left, feeling that Mailis must be the strongest woman she's ever met- the remorse she's feeling would have tempted me into suicide many years ago.


	10. Chapter 7: Skills and Weaknesses

I wake up the next morning to find that the broken pieces of glass now disappeared, and that my thoart and eyes hurt from crying again as I drifted off to sleep. Going to supper last night was a bad idea. I didn't look in the mirror first, so the looks of pity on Ako and Nowl's faces at first had me stumped, until I sat down and Nowl asked me if I was okay, when I nodded and drained my milk did I realize that I must have looked pretty rough. We barely talked all supper, which was unusual for Nowl, and I found myself- even though I didn't want to talk- missing his voice.

With that thought came an afterthought, _did I like Nowl Flight? _But as soon as thought reached my head did I laugh. Yes, I like Nowl Flight, a lot, because he is my best friend. There is no other word for it, I mean, he's good looking, but nothing to fantasize over. He was simply my only friend. But who had been on my mind was that boy from district twelve who had winked at me. At first I had daydreamed a bit about him during our quiet supper, until I realize that the wink could mean something comepletly different, he could be saying that he wants to kill me. He could have picked me as an enemy right off the bat. But I didn't want him as an enemy, he was far too goodlooking, and when he laughed at cow girl's joke, he had the perect dimples, throughing his head back at the just right angle..

Breakfast! Right breakfast was more important than what I was last thinking about, as it was food, and it meant that I wouldn't be cooking for Calif, so I made my way down to the dining room of our district and sat again, next to Nowl.

"Morning bird, sing a tune!" Nowl said this request everytime I went down for breakfast. It might have been embrassing the first time, but after Nowl had threathened tickling the tune out of me, I gave in, and no one laughed, but clapped. Therefore this morning, I hymmed a bird's song, sat down and smiled. We were all still in our pjamas.

I had only just finished putting food on my plate when I heard the voice of my mentor, "trainning day," Mailis walked without the bounce in her step. She was all business today, "Ako, what should they do?"

Ako, the blue man, noticing that this was the time to strategize put down his fork and took his eyes away from his eyes, "what are your skills?"

"Sword fighting," I told him, knowing that that was the only thing I've ever practiced, "that's it."

"That's a lie," Nowl smirked, I raised my eyebrow, I hadn't been lying, "you can swim."

_"How do you know that?" _I screeched. Blood boiling, I blinked to keep the tears from sufficing.

Nowl looked taken aback from my outburst, he stuttered, "I-I saw you swim a long t-time ago. Sorry, but you were really good at it," he paused, then added, "sorry."

That answer made sense, but getting angry over someone knowing that you can swim wasn't resonable enough. I became aware that everyone became silent at the table and was looking at me with shocked expressions. I hastely tried to explain myself, "no, Nowl, I'm sorry. It's just," I kept blinking back tears, but my voice broke as I quietly mummered, "it's something my dad tought me."

Ako was the only one who didn't look like he understood what I had said, but Mailis must have surely heard the gossip, and Nowl already knew about my father before I told him.

"I-I'm sorry bird," Nowl said, pity in his voice.

"It's okay, Nowl," but my words of comfort to him didn't stop him from getting up from his chair, and telling me to get up, once up, he pulled me into a gigantic bear hug. Once the hug broke off, I pushed my emotions to the back of me and said, "Nowl, what are _your _skills?"

This seemed to bring everyone in the room back to the Hunger Games, Mailis looked intently at Nowl for his answer, but it was me who answered for him, "he's stealth. Sneak's up on me and gives me heart attacks at least ten times a day."

"Perfect!" Mailis smiled, for the first time since she told her story, "Nowl, that awesome, anything else?"

Mailis seemed to be really encouraging Nowl, who was blushing at her random compliments.

"I er- read a lot of books that might help me," he paused, "and I know bird calls."

Everyone went silent, apparently Mailis and Ako thought that of his three skills, reading and bird calls where not what they were expecting from a district two kid.

"No weapons skills?" asked Ako, who's voice tried to hid his disapointment.

"I mean, I've taken weapon classes, all of them, knive throwing, archery, sword fighting, boxing, and spears, just I'm not very good at them," it was getting awkward as Nowl trailed off.

"You should spend a lot of time in camouflage," I spoke up, "I know that it sounds cowardly, but hiding until the games is at a low number has been the best strategy for a lot of tributes. You can confuse them with bird calls, too." I didn't know how to say this, and it probably wouldn't have come across as good, but over protective and it would give away my plan for death, but I really would have rather said, 'but I plan on hiding you so you don't get hurt, because I want you to win'.

And just as soon as I thought it, a plan was forming in my mind, to keep Nowl camouflaged and safe, while I got food for him sounded like a good way to go, then I could take out whoever was left in the final three, then kill myself, so Nowl wouldn't have any blood on his hands, but then my mind sighed at me, Nowl wouldn't let you do that for him, he's far too nice. Plus, when would I get to tarnish my mother and Calif?

My mother and Calif, I choked on my food thinking of them because well, _I hadn't _been thinking of them. Why had the two main reasons for volunteering for the Hunger Games not popped in my mind since, oh god, before the chariot races? I hadn't thought yet a good way to posion my mother's name, and deface the diamond-clad wedding ring Cal gave me.

"Pauper?" Nowl slapped my face lighty and I jumped.

"Thinking hard about it?" Ako asked.

"About what, sorry?"

"What are your weaknesses? Stuff you should be practicing?" Mailis asked impatiently.

"Oh, the edible plants station, and archery," I paused, "oh- and hand-to-hand combat."

The mentor and the escort nodded at that, then turned to Nowl, "I think I should learn hand-to-hand combat, and maybe try to master weapon."

There was a very long pause, and Mailis opened her mouth several times before getting the words out, awkwardly "are you two allying in the arena?"

I looked at Nowl, and he me, it was a subconsious agreement we made the first time he called me bird that made us both say, at the same time, "of course."

We smiled, and finished our plates in pointless chatter, now knowing our plans for later that day. I returned to my room before going down to the training arena. I had just enough time to put on makeup and through my blonde hair up before, and in haste I spent my time thinking about today than paying attention to my appearence. After a half an hour I got out of my pjamas and stood glaring at my wardrobe willing it to pick out the clothes for me, for I didn't feel like going down like I am in my bra and underwear.

"Coming bird- oh sorry!"

"Jesus, Nowl!"


	11. Chapter 8: Flynn Venustus

Nowl found himself apologizing throughly at not knocking all the way to the training arena. He turned a bright shade of scarlet and I worried that he would never turn back to him pale self since his blush lasted the entire walk down. When he first saw me I picked up the nearest pillow and threw it at him, he quickly shut the door and I apologized threw the door. All I could do on the other hand was laugh, I couldn't even console him because I couldn't get enough breath to do anything other than laugh. I threw on a pair of cargo pants, a black tank top, and slipped into my sneakers, still laughing. Nowl was waiting at the door still saying sorry to me, I then decided to joke around with him,

"So, what now," I said in a mock-seductive voice, holding in my laugh that was begging to bark out.

"B-Bird!" He stammered, going if possible, reder. I raised my eyebrow, still holding in my laughter, but a smile playing on my lips, he saw the smile, and threw the pillow back at me, "you temptress!"

Even after telling him that it was okay, and that it was really no big deal, he was still saying sorry every few seconds. We almost reached the arena doors when I stopped. Nowl, who was looking at the ground behind me, waked right into me, sending me falling, catching myself an inch before my nose hit the ground with my hands.

"Sor- oh I'm sorry bird!"

_"Quit apologizing!" _I said as he helped me up.

"That sorry was for making you fall," he laughed.

"But the other thousand sure weren't," I gave him the death stare, making his laughter flatter and stop.

"Being serious, I'm really sorry," he said, seriously.

"Being serious, it's really no big deal, so what if you've seen me in my underwear, at least someone will before I die! It's not a bad thing Nowl, unless- unless I'm ugly?" I added in the last part in attempt to make a joke, but Nowl still thought I was being serious.

"No-no-nonono, no, not at all, Pauper, it wouldn't be so awkward if you were ugly. Your too hot for your own good,"

I barked a laugh, then said breathily, "I'm flattered, Nowl, I am, now can we go train?" at what seemed like the same time me and Nowl looked at the doors, trainning would begin in fifteen minutes, but seeing as Nowl showed up to my room early and we didn't want to hang around my room, we went in early.

And apparently were weren't the only ones who wanted to come in early. The district one tribute from yesterday, the girl with the blonde hair I saw from behind yesterday was chewing her thumbnail while waiting for the training to start. She was rather pale and sick looking, and she had her arms crossed just like she did on the chariot ride. Her eyes stood out with black eyeliner, and she was wearing all black, she had a deafed and silent look about her that made me feel like maybe we were both in this for the same reasons. Maybe she wanted to die here too, in the place of someone else?

I took my eyes off her to see the other contestants. There early alwell was a tall, tan boy who had jet black hair and purple eyes. He looked like he was thinking hard about something, but I looked away quickly because his unnatural eyes scared me a bit. The blue hair girl who was once dressed as a mermaid stood smiling brightly to no one in particular, seemingly excited about something. A big girl with brown hair and a rather hard tough looking face was glaring at her smile.

The door opened again and in came the cow girl, who was out of the cow girl and into a normal workout outfit, she reminded me faintly of a pixie, and was surronded by the tall gangly girl and none other than- my stomach tightened- the boy who winked at me, followed closly by the little red haired girl. The boy who winked say me staring again and waved at me, I turned on my heel so pretend like I was talking to Nowl, when I noticed that Nowl had left me. It took me two seconds to look back around and find that he was making his way to the cow girl. I sighed, thinking that I'd end up calling her cow girl until I learned her name, so hopefully Nowl would tell me soon.

I furrowed my eyebrows, but what if Nowl and this girl _are_ perfect for each other? What if he ditches you and gets himself killed trying to save her? I shook my head, than I'd die saving her too, because Nowl would want me too, and I wouldn't want him to die in vain. But, of course, this might not even happen, and maybe I'll get to know her before we die for her.

I horn blew, signaling the start of the week of trainning, and I went straight to a stout man at edible plants. The man seemed rather excited to have a person at his station, he combed his moustache then began on a long speech about which plants are edible. He then took an hour up testing me, until I got the majority right. Then sometime afterwards I figured I should look up and check out my competition.

The big burnette still had the scowl on her face as she threw knives into dummies and missed only two. The little red haird girl was learning how to make fires. Nowl was with the cow girl and her tall gangly blonde haired friend at the sword yeilding station, where I couldn't help but notice that he was holding the sword wrong. A girl who I hadn't seen walk in with white hair and brown eyes was at the archery rage, sending arrows rather close to the target, I choose to join her next.

"Hello," I said polietely, she looked up from her bow and stuttered a hi.

Her hair was in medium lenght pigtails, and she was the only one wearing jeans to training, I felt curious about her, "what district are you from?"

"District six," she said, this time more certain, "medience."

I couldn't help but think that a healer would be perfect on my team, but then another thought hit me.

"Are there no career groups this year?" I asked, looking around, indeed, the usual group of district one, two, and four were not together. The gothic girl from one was tying knots intentivly, while her counterpart was spear throwing with a the pair from district three, but surely me and Nowl were being recruited or anything. Was it because we looked weak? Or did no careers try out for this?

"It looks like the lower districts are making themselves careers," the girl said vaguely, now interested in looking at the groups, and it was true. The girl with brown hair had now joined forces with the violet eyed man, a pale man with dark brown hair, and a scowling red haired girl, all of who looked like they were careers just by their build, "but the purple-eyed guy is from district four, he was dressed as a merman yesterday."

"This year's different," I acknowelged, "I'm Pauper by the way, Pauper Dea Bukater."

"Char Rubhol," she said as we both turned back to begin and resume archery. Archery was something I had tried once before and wasn't very good at it, but it seemed like a smart idea to learn this weapon, just in case the arena was a desert, or flat ground, where there was no hiding spaces, so that a long range weapon would be perfect. After fifteen more minutes, I was getting a little better, but not as good as Char was getting.

Suddenly a pair of arms wrapped themeselves around me in a hug from behind, I hadn't heard anyone walk over, and a with a inner sigh of relief, and said breathlessly, "Nowl!"

"Not quite," the pair of arms let go of me and I turned around, confused.

My breath caught as I saw who it was, the winking, waving boy from district tweleve.

"And who's Nowl anyways, your boyfriend from your district?"

I spluttered to explain that in no way was I taken, well, not in a way I counted, "he's just my friend, but he is the boy from my district," Char, who had been looking at us got bored of this conversation and turned back to shooting targets.

"Ah, single, good," he smiled, a perfect half smile, and all I could do was raise my eyebrow at him, "I'm Flynn Venustus,"

"I'm Pauper Dea Bukater,"

"I know, I watched you begin reaped," I raised my eyebrow again, I never watched the reapings, "did you know that little girl that you volunteered for?"

"No, not really," I locked eyes with him, and saw the instant conclusion.

"Oh, want the glory, than" he didn't say it as a question,

"No, actually, nothing like that," as good looking as he was the assumtion hurt, or maybe it hurt more because he was so goodlooking. So I turned around back to my bow and arrows.

I could tell I was begin watched, so I tried my hardest to get it right in the middle, but right as I was about to shot, Flynn clapped next to my ear. I jumped, realizing my bow and having it miss the target compeletly, but getting the target next to mine dead center.

_"What was that for?"_ I screeched and turned on him.

"Just testing you," he was smirking, clearly enjoying the look on my face, we were an inch apart and I had to look up to glare at him, "in the arena, noises will be going off all the time, just trying to help."

I muttered a "trying to help my ass," while turning back around. I picked up my bow and arrow, ready to try again. I felt the eyes one me once more, and prepared myself for any noises, I was just about to shot when a hand lightly touched the small of my back, and I jumped again, and relesed the arrow which, for a seond time hit dead center of the target next to me.

"You know, I'm going to make sure that I'm not next to the guy you're aiming at in the arena, 'kay?" Flynn laughed, and I turned again to face him, where this time I had to back up because he was so close.

"You touched me, it wasn't my fault!" I huffed then for the third time, turned back and set my bow.

"I was only trying to help- here, lemme teach you," he seemed to be getting frustered because he huffed at me too.

"Fine," was all I could say, because at the same time, Flynn placed his hand on my arm, bending it so that it became completly straight. Next he put his other hand on the small of my back, which me shiver involunteerily, and he laughed in my ear as he made my back straighter.

Flynn broke away from me rather abrutly, and said "there, now let go," I let go, feeling that I finally got this, that with his help, I was going to be the best archerer in the entire history of the games- until my arrow yet again ended dead center alongside the other too. Flynn roared with laughter, and I had to join in, our laughter was so loud it attrached the attention of others.

"Hi, bird," Nowl, alongside the cowgirl and her blonde friend made their way twoards us, "having fun?"

"Hi, Nowl," I smiled, a little sad for the show of a new group of people, the same size of the careers, I ignored his question and saw that the big brunette glaring at us, "we look like we're forming an alliance."

Nowl looked shocked by the harsh tone my voice came out as, "sorry, we'll- we'll go."

"No, Nowl, I'm sorry," I grabbed his arm as he turned to leave, "I wouldn't mind making one, just we should be secretive about it."

His blue eyes now showed understanding, and I smirked, "so get outta here, before I take my clothes off."

Nowl and I laughed, "but I said I was sorry!" the looks from the cowgirl, her friend, and Fylnn made it obvious that my joke clearly was too much of an awkward insider, this only made us laugh more.

But thankfully before they were there too long, Nowl and his girlfriends left, and apparently so did Char, who I almost forgot was there.

"I'm not leaving, does that mean you'll take your clothes off?" Flynn raised his eyebrow at me, I let out a laugh.

"Not yet, I wanna see if you can do this," I handed him my bow and arrow, which he unsurprisingly he was amazing at archery.

Flynn gave me a look, "now?"

We both laugh extremely loud again, then in the most serious voice I aburtly stopped laughing and said, "okay."

The look on his face was worth anything he might be picturing, as we yet again laughed together.

"So are we all going to make a big alliance then?" he asked after our laughing fit.

"After we see who survives the corrnucopia, we'll allign with whos ever left." I said grimly, thinking that Nowl, Char, and Flynn were two more friends than I've ever had in my life, but that I could only save one. It seems foreign that a second ago I was laughing.


	12. Chapter 9: Rooftop BirdCalls

**So I had this amazing idea for a story like no other, but well, I really sort of fell inlove with one character, and well, the whole story has change now, hasn't it? I now really appreciate Suzanna Collins, and all authors I couldn't imagine killing off one of my favourite characters. Changed the name, and the ending, but still the same Pauper.**

Something was nagging at the corner of my mind, but with all the worries I have now with the stress of the Hunger Games, this one little thing shouldn't be a big idea. Supper the night of day one trainer got really awkward, Nowl had mentioned about how we would be making a huge alliance with Flynn, cowgirl and her friend (whom I was told are named Electra and Libera), and surprising Char, who had signaled for me to stay behind after training, and said she wanted in. The awkward part was how Mailis snapped at Nowl, saying that an alliance that big would be pointless, and that one person could easily manipluate everyone, just as she had done. She said she wanted just us two to stay together, and although I didn't object, Nowl did, which surprisingly, something new I found out, is that things hurt a lot more than suppose to. I left supper a few minutes later, and blinked back the tears again.

Ever since the tears escaped, they've wanted out again, my mission before I die, which may only be a few more days, is to get them back like they've always been. Nowl knocked on my door sometime later, apologizing again, and once I accepted it, we laughed about how much he had to apologize to me.

We stayed up late that night, planning our survival for the games, I didn't know how to tell him that what we were ultimately discussing was his survival, as me dying for him I assume would be a touchy subject. But what our plans really focused around was that dispite what Mailis said, Nowl wanted to stay with Electra, and I hinted that Flynn would do really go inside our alliance. We discussed the pros and cons about Libera and Char, who after hours into the night, we decided we'd add in, as Libera excelled at weightlighting, and randomly dancing, and Char turned out to be incredible edible plants, and she was very quite. By three in the morning, Nowl suggested that we met up on the roof top tomorrow night so that no one knows about our new alliance, and I agree, saying that we'll stay together ourselves for the rest of trainning, but mention it to people in secretive by whispering it to them at a station, not acknowleging each other. We both fell asleep on my bed that night, me curled up like a cat and Nowl leaning his head up against my wall.

It was hard to believe that less than a week ago I was trapped in a life of endless boring parties, and was about to marry a guy for money because of my greed-filled mother. Although I'm still trapped, all these new friends makes me feel like I'm free, so when Nowl tells me to 'sing a tune, bird' at breakfast I sing, and feel like I am a bird, flying free.

I was really tired from staying up so late, and wasn't very comprendable at trainning the next day, accidently spearing the wall instead of the dummy, and getting a bark of a laugh from Fylnn, who agreed to join us at one tonight on the room.

Me and Nowl made our way up to the top of the building early, in case we needed to get people to leave, but thinking that just our presence will make people leave. I reached the final step when I saw that sure enough, we weren't the only ones there, the big girl with the brown hair was looking over at the Capitol skyline, she turned at our loud arrival, and just stared at us, well, more like a glare. She looked like wasn't leaving, but I still attempted, with the first thing I could think of, "excuse, could we er- have a little privacy?" I said in my best ditzy voice, she kept her scowl and contniued to stare at us, willing us to go back down the stairs.

I grabbed Nowl's hand and slopped against him, "can you just let us love birds have some alone time?" I keep the ditzy voice, and willed Nowl to play along, and thankfully, he did.

"Who cares if she's here bird, as long as I'm with you, nothing can stop me!" and with that Nowl Flight shocked me once again, but pulling me into a hungry kiss.

My world stopped, _why did my thoughts melt away? Why am I liking it? Why did everything seemed so-so perfect? _My mind screeched at me to stop. _Stop Pauper! _but my heart, and while my mouth said keep going, because everything was just right.

The door slammed behind us and we regrettbly broke free. Our faces mirrored each other, shock plastered on his face, and mine. I whipped my lips as the door opened behind us.

"Good! I thought you wouldn't be here! But Libby said, 'of course Electra, _they _invited_ us_', but this, this is a big game move, huge! I'm excited!" Electra marched and stood beside Nowl, unaware of anything going on, Libera soon followed after in more of a shy matter. Char was next to arrive, simply smiling at me once she reached the door, after what seemed like a long seven minutes, Flynn showed up, I smiled warmly at him, and felt Nowl's eyes trying to read my face. But Flynn brought something tagging behind him, something little, with bright red hair.

"Flynn.." I said nervously.

"She followed me, I couldn't stop her, she overheard him telling Electra, and tailed me," he sighed.

We all looked together nervously, it was a long awkward pause before the little girl spoke up, "I'm good at fires, climbing, and can throw a mean knife."

I blinked, "I don't see why not then," I ranked my brain for a reason, which none came up. I've seen that age doesn't matter in these games, other than everyone feels a lot more pity when they die, and Adella Herter won the thirtyfifth annual games, at just eleven but playing the cute card, showing that this little girl might be an asset, "what's your name?"

"Artemis Haliee," she smiled, happy to be accepted.

There was an even longer pause now, where my eyes stayed glue to the floor to stop looking at Nowl, in this pause Flynn thought that it was the perfect time to put his arm around my waist, all I could do was giggle at my stupidity- I'm going to die in days anyway, why did it matter who I was kissing, or cuddling, or even sleeping with. _Nothing matters_, I am trapped in the games, but free to live.

"So what now?" asked Char finally.

My eyes avoided Nowl's as they met Char's, who was conventianlly standing next to him, "I was thinking, that there's a big possiblilty that we might get spilt up at the corrnacopia, so we could maybe, have a call so that we know not to k-kill the person we hear."

"Like a bird call?" Nowl perked up, and I looked at him and smiled.

"What if the arena doesn't have birds in it?" said Electra.

"We can have three signals, just incase," I said, "but we need to memorize them."

"A knock," Artemis suggested.

"Good, one more,"

"Two should be fine," said Electra, "I mean, what are we going to do, bird-call it all the time?"

"Only if we hear someone, no one else will know what it is, just a bird passing by," said Nowl.

"Two should be fine, yeah," I nodded, feeling that I was more tired than I thought.

We spent the next ten minutes having Nowl teaching us the call of the nightingale, and Flynn coming up with a knock that we all mastered within minutes. Finally, leaving in groups of two, and Char, we all departed for our rooms.

I left in the second group, speed walking away from the roof top and what happened on it. I made it to my room, and started to get ready for bed, when Nowl opened the door, I grabbed again the closet pillow to me and threw it at him.

"Sorry-sorry bird," Nowl simply closed his eyes and covered them with a hand this time, and closed the door. I was too lazy too put on pjamas, or so I told myself, I walked up to him and grabbed his hands to move them away from his eyes. He took this as a signal to open his eyes, but as he did he laughed once and said sadly, "bird,"

I furrowed my brow, why did he sound so sad? Assuming it was what I was wearing I turned to throw on pjamas, "it doesn't matter," I said quietly, "it's not a big deal."

He blinked, then nodded, "it was just to get Thailia out of the rooftop, nothing else," he turned too quickly for me to say anything else. Even thought my heart burned for me to run after him I couldn't. He's right, he didn't feel anything in the kiss, 'nothing else', nothing could come of it anyway, what would be the point? Be together for the next few days, save his life, and what? He'd live with the thought of me constantly on his mind. No, no it didn't make sense. Where was the freedom I had thought about earlier? Couldn't I do anything now, since death was an acceptance? I moved to sit on my bed, wishing that this had gone different, wishing that Nowl Flight stayed the night again tonight.


	13. Chapter 10: Silent Suppers

I get to the table for breakfast, and, for once, am not asked to sing out a tune. In fact, for what seems like the first time in a long time I feel as though I'm screaming in a crowded room, and no one even looks up, a feeling I've had so many times at all of Calif's wealthy socials. I'm screaming at Ako for telling me that I should work harder in trainning, I'm screaming at Mailis for the look she's giving me, and loudest I'm screaming at the blonde haired boy next to me, who won't met my gaze, I'm screaming so loud, but only on the inside. On the outside I'm a mask.

I went in my bra and underwear down to breakfast every morning, just to make Nowl regret rejecting my advances, but wear my cargos to the trainning room, where I have shut myself out to anything but trainning. It's the sixth day of trainning when Flynn comes up to me and sweeps me off my feet, holding me like a bride and spinning me in a circle.

"Cheer up, there's no need to look so sad," the look I give him makes him laugh, "oh right, we're in the Hunger Games," and I laugh geniually, knowing that he alongside me is feeling the bitter sting of the Hunger Games.

"For every one sad thing, there's ten positive ones," I smiled, forgetting the ropes me and Nowl were tying momentarily.

"Deep, Bukater," he smiled back, "I didn't know you had it in you."

"The kids in the slums used to each other it all the time," I smiled bigger, "I miss them."

"You're a poor district two gal?" he seemed intrigued, "I shoulda guessed."

"I'm not," it seemed like a lot to explain, but, "not exsactly, my dad ran off with our money, so I lived in the slums for a bit until my mother found us some."

"Found? They just have money laying on the floor in district two?"

I laughed, "no, she married me off."

His eyes grew huge, and he grabbed my left hand, "phew! How did I miss that? Drop you in water and you'll sink right to the bottom, like an anchor, it is."

I laughed hard, then stopped, and said quietly and mischeviously, "it's my token- it's what I'll use to deface Calif."

He grinned, "well, I can help you with that, at the interview-"

A third arrival to our party cut it short, as Nowl said out of the corner of his mouth while still tying ropes, "our alliance is secret, please don't blow it," which put an end up our conversation as Flynn winked, then walked off and I rejoined Nowl in tying ropes.

Trainning ended the next day, where I spent the entire time praticing hand-on-hand combat, and found myself strangely good at it, espeacially for a girl who has never had to lift a finger before. But with trainning ending came more strategic talk the next day over breakfast, this time focusing on interviews, which would be taking place tomorrow.

I sat down in my usual seat next to Nowl, making no eye contact, as per the new usual. I still ate in my bra and underwear, feeling that it was a lot comfier anyway, and made a silent statement. Helping myself to eggs and toast, and voiced a thought, "should we met up again with our alliance, before the games?"

Unknowingly, I had talked to Nowl for the first time since he left my room, he looked over at me, face impassive and replied, "no, they know the signals. I don't want people to get suspicious."

Mailis gave me a funny look, but I just nodded and put my eyes to my eggs. I was used to her 'alknowing' looks by now, they accomplianed everytime I looked up. It was another long silence before Mailis spoke up for stragetgy talk, "interviews are today, Ako, what should Nowl's stragetgy be?"

My mouth dropped a bit, "I-I don't need an angle?" I get that I asked Mailis to give sponsor gifts to Nowl, but that shouldn't mean that we don't use me to get more sponsors.

"You're mysterious, Pauper," Nowl said, then paused, "angle wise."

A lump grew in my throat, and I told myself I was being stupid. Just because it was the first time he had used my actual name instead of bird doesn't mean anything. All I could was nod.

"Then your angle should be a sweetheart kind," words slipped out quietly, and I only looked at my almost empty plate, "because you are one."

It was a long time before I looked up, and daringly I looked to see his face, it looked confused, which bewildered me.

"That's a good angle for him, he's handsome enough," Mailis jumped in.

We spend the day practicing our interviews in our rooms, Mailis asks me questions that will most likely appear, but gives up after an hour after getting frustrated that I only give yes or no answers, bellowing at me, "_mysterious_, Pauper, not bored!" But I was very bored with it. I just wanted to wing my interview, knowing that I worked best under pressure; and that whatever Flynn was planning for the interview to help me deface my wedding ring would be something that couldn't be rehershed. I told Mailis to just go and help Nowl with his interview, which she gave me again her all-knowing look, then left.

I just sat in silence, focusing my stress onto my hatred of Calif, and my mother.

I rejoined the rest of the district two team for supper that evening, where everyone looked rather disgruntled. I asked them how'd their day was, and was snapped at by Mailis who said that I was stupid for coming up with the sweetheart angle (which she said the word as though it was the worst thing in the world) seeing that Nowl was not a sweetheart and could kiss her ass. Holding in my laugh, we had another supper in silence.

Being so quiet lately, I've had a lot more time to think. The main thing was of course, of love. I scream inwardly at knowing that I'll it's all so pointless to even think about it. Love in the Hunger Games? It's like a circle, pointless. But so why was the thought constantly on my mind? Because I knew that this love could save someone's life. The thing is, whos? Me and Nowl weren't on speaking basis anymore, but who said I didn't still have feelings for him? I still want him to live, and I remember thinking that Nowl Flight was someone worth dying for, as he still is. Even if he doesn't like me. But now Flynn was put into the picture, the guy who continually sneaks up behind me to grab my waist, the guy who feels the need to have one arm around my waist, well, that guy seems like someone I fell very quikcly for. I couldn't help but think that if it had been me and Flynn who made it up to the rooftop and we kissed, he wouldn't call it nothing, we'd have already had so many more kisses to fill up a lifetime supply within our remaining days.


	14. Chapter 11: Defacing My Wedding Ring

Paisley, my head stylist was in a surprisingly good mood this morning. Perhaps it was because it was being compared to my bad mood. The reason for my bad mood? Well, it took me awhile to admit this, but it has to do with my dress Paisley designed. It's a white dress, which isn't so bad, but the thing is, Paisley made from my hips down into feathers. Thousands of white feathers parading down my legs, and more feathers on my neckline. I lied to Paisley and told her I loved it, and at first sight I did- until we met up with Nowl, and I couldn't help but thinking that this made me look like the bird he _used to _call me. This dress just reminds me of how I felt after I left for the Hunger Games, but before the rooftop kiss- happy.

I just want to be happy again.

So as we made our way to where our interview will take place, I focused all my thoughts on what Flynn will do today, if he even will. I'm wearing the wedding ring, and I have to admit- I'm very eager to deface it. But I'm not putting all my hope for posioning my mothers and Calif's name in Flynn, I have some plans on my own for the interview.

Finally we made it to wear our interviews will take place, and looking out at what seemed to be the whole Capitol population, I told myself that these nerves were pointless, and tried to change them into excitment. _It's time to live_, I told myself. I had to make up for all the times I never lived before the Hunger Games. And in no time I was sitting with Nowl on my right, who looked a little pale, and on my left the boy from district one. For no reason at all, a hysterical laugh escaped my lips, and Nowl turned to me to give me a confused smile.

The host of the interview is Rustun Flickerman, a rather plump man whos moustache is dyed pink, just the the color of his hair, "the forty-first Hunger Games tributes!" he says, and gestures to all of us sitting behind him on the stage that's placed in view of the city. He says a few jokes at the tributes expense to pump up the audience, but I don't think they need much more pumping- they are already so rowdy. Finally he gets down to business, calling the girl from district one to sit in the chair beside him. She wearing a red dress that looks a lot like the one she wore to the chariot rides, and it looks so silly against her dark black eyes, and posture that says she doesn't want to be here.

"Hannah Reede, everybody!" And the crowd claps excitingly. Her interview stood out to me, it was exsactly like I had practiced it yesterday with Mailis, she really did seem bored. She only answered 'yes' or 'no' to anything asked, even though Rustun tried to get more stuff out of her, when asked about her life back home, she answered with "I wouldn't call it life," which made me want to hug her. Her male counterpart's interview went well, he was rather funny, and told the crowd that he was excited to met all these awesome new people, but he really couldn't wait to kill some of them, which made my heart stop. All too soon that boy, Leek's interview was up, and I was being called to the stage.

"Pauper Dea Bukater, everyone!" and I can't help notice that the applause it a lot more loud than it was for the poor district one girl, but I still smile larger than I have been this whole time. It's my chance at revenge now, and I sit down next to Rustun.

"So tell me, how do you like the Capitol?"

I blink then say, "it sure beats home,"

"What has been you're favourtie thing about the Hunger Games, Pauper?"

I laugh, then say beaming, "I could name thousands, but being away from my mother and my fiance, I have to say that's the best part." My mind always wants to say Nowl Flight, but my mouth stops me.

This was the right to say, as Rustun's eyebrow raises and he says, "oh? A fiance huh, tell me about him,"

More than I ever told anyone, I feel that it's now time to tell the world about Calif, "Cal, well, I'm only engaged to him for his money, my mom set the whole thing up," the audience goes silent, "and I might have been happy with it, if it weren't for the fact that he's dumber than a goldfish," this gets the audience laughing, "oh, and he's lousy in bed."

Rustun Flickerman and the audience roar with laughter, and I look in the camera that's zoomed up on my face and wink, just for good measure.

"Now, what's you're stragedy for the games?" he says after he controls his laughter.

I stop smiling and say darkly, "well, we'll have to wait and see."

But all too soon my three minutes are up, and I hug Rustun and sit back down, and he calls out, "Nowl Flight!"

My stomach tightens as I see Nowl approaching where I was just, and I look down at my feathers. What shocks me the most about Nowl's interview is that he does the oppisite of the sweetheart angle. He acts like a ruthless killing mahcine, which makes my smile fade, because I know he's not. I'm shocked at his angle, but it seems to work for him, and when the camera does a close up of him, I notice that it doesn't look like Nowl Flight anymore, but he looks like all the district two tributes who are in the Hunger Games for glory. I bite my lip as I remember him telling me on the train that it was his dad's dream for him to be in the games, not him, maybe he lied to get me in his alliance? _What if it's an act? _I ask myself, well, I hope I'm not the one to find out that it's not.

Time ticks by and the interviews go by like a blur, but some stood out to me. Vail Hedowl, the girl with the blue hair from district four was funny, though not attempting to be, as she said she'd rather just dance instead of the interview, which Rustun tells her to go ahead. She's a rather good dancer. Her male counterpart, Favian Brito with the tanned skin and violet eyes is proud, and confident in his interview. Char is friendly, but sly and cunning. The tall and gangly Libera is quiet, but funny, and Remus Night just gave me the chills with his cold voice. Electra is funny too, and pretty, which Rustun takes a whole minute up by telling her that. The girl I kissed infront of, Thailia Rush has a lot in common with Nowl's interview. I wait paitently for Flynn's interview, and finally as the small Artemis leaves her interview by saying that she has many skills, and to not underestimate her, I get a rush of excitment to hear, "the Capitol, met Flynn Venustus!"

Flynn walks proudly upto the seat, but instead of sitting down, he says, "hold on one second," and he turns and walks back to the seats. My mouth is open wide as I notice that he's heading my way, and when he reaches me, he offers his hand to me, whispers, "play along," and without thinking, I take it, and he leads me back to the front of the stage, sitting down, and pulling me onto his lap.

"Well, this is new," says Rustun, still smiling.

"I just wanted the Capitol to see me and my girlfriend together before we die," Flynn jokes.

Rustun raises his eyebrow, just as intrigued as I am, then plays along well, "Pauper, is he better in bed than your fiance?"

With a dead serious face I saw, "is that even a question? You can't get any better," and with that Flynn pulls me into a kiss, a hungry kiss that is broadcasted live. And so I unlock my left hand from his hair, and give the camera next to me not the middle finger, but my wedding ring finger, defacing it as I keep making out with Flynn Venustus.


	15. Chapter 12: Food Fights and Late Nights

**Well, everyone makes mistakes, so here's mine: no training score? Well, I thought a lot about it, and decided on a way to keep the training scores in to fix my mistake. This is the past, the 41st Hunger Games were a little different than the 73rd, 74th, and 75th, seeing as the training scores come after the interview, so the audience has more of an idea as to what they did to get such a high or low score. And with that, I'd like to congratulate my main man Harry Potter for sweeping the Teen Choice Awards. Chhyeah!**

Out of all that flew into my mind when Flynn told me he'd help me disgrace my fiance's name, that kiss sure wasn't anything close to what I had dreamed up. And nethier was the aftershock. Reactions were as followed: the audience roared with applause, which I assume is because their favourite television show had just become a lot more interesting, Mailis wasn't thrilled about it, but Ako seemed to think that it would bring in more sponsors, but the reaction of Nowl, well, he seemed to have switched.

From not talking, or even looking at me after our kiss, he was now back to everything he was. It was like we never kissed. I was just getting used to not being talked to by Nowl, but as soon as we made our way our elevator to the second floor, Nowl surprised me with stragetic talk about how he felt about all the interviews. It felt weird having my best friend back in my life, but I yearned to tell him how the kiss we shared made me feel, but thought about how silly and selfish it'd be of me too. Not only could I lose Nowl talking to me again, but how would he feel if I told him I loved him, then died saving him? As for Flynn, I sat on his lap the rest of the interview, but could only whisper a thanks to him before the interview ended and everyone dispatched.

That night at dinner we all had pointless chatter, in which Mailis kept on wanting to talk about tomorrow's trainning scores, but me and Nowl were far too busy seeing how high we could lanch a pea with a spoon. Mailis ended up picking up and tipping over my plate onto my head after my launch had gotten so hiliariously into her nagging mouth. Me and Nowl made our way back to my room soon after that, still in hysterics.

I was covered in my food, with barbequed chicken on my shoulder and in my hair, my mashed potatoes making their way down my top, and remaining peas toppling on my floor with every step I took. Nowl followed me in my room, although I had to turn around- sending more food chunks flying- to see if he was there due to him being ridiculously light on his feet.

Still laughing I said, "you might as well make yourself comfortable, I need to shower," and with that Nowl raised his eyebrows, but sat down on bed.

I gagged everytime I looked down at the food clogging in the shower pipes, but finished within fifiteen minutes, I wrapped my towl around me, and walked out of the bathroom to see Nowl twiddling his tumbs in boredem. He then looked up and raised his eyebrows for the second time tonight, "I thought you'd be done with all this tempting stuff, bird,"

My legs melted as he called me bird, I really did miss it, but what he said made me laugh once, "I just forgot to grab clothes on my way in, but I think I'll keep wearing my underwear to breakfast- it's getting quite comfy."

His smile faded as I said this, which shocked me, but I understood as soon as he said "we only have two more breakfasts until the arena."

I thought of a thousand different sad things to say back, but I didn't want to spend the night crying, "well, then I hope it's not too cold in the arena and I'll continue my routine,"

Thankfully Nowl laughed, then said in a would-be casusal way, "I'm sure your boyfriend will love that."

"Boyfriend?" I questioned as I scrumaged threw my dresser for some pjamas, "Calif is my fiance, and he doesn't have any right to love anything about me."

"No, I mean your boyfriend, Flynn," he continued this casual tone of voice, "when did you guys start dating?"

My eyes focus strongly at the dresser ahead of me, not looking at the boy who asked the question, "we're not dating, he just wanted to help me send a er- message to Calif."

"Oh," it was an awkward silence as I finally found the pjamas that were on the top of the pile I was ramaging threw.

The silence was broken by none other than a familiar bird call, a knock I had praticed, and a note slide under my door. Me and Nowl looked at each other than raced each other to get the note first. As I was closer I got it first, but Nowl attempted to wrestle it out of my hands, he almost had it when I screamed, "I'm about to lose my towel- let go!" which in reality I really wasn't about to, but he let go immediatly and apologized twice, which caused me to laugh.

I opened the note which had slanted writting written on it saying only

_Same place, same time, all of us have been notified._

It wasn't signed, and I furrowed my brows at it, but Nowl, faster minded said, "we have to go back to the rooftop again?"

I tried not to think of what the rooftop had meant once, "same time, wonder what's going on,"

"Might be big," he frowned.

"Or could be nothing," I said, putting down the note and grabbing a dress from my dresser, not wanting to go up in my pjs. I told Nowl to turn around as I slipped on my bra, underwear, and dress.

I sat down on my bed and he came to sit beside me, I threw my hair up in a bun and sighed, it was only nine, and it would be a long time before the same time came around again. I didn't want to be half asleep again as I tried for a good training score tomorrow. I smiled, trying to remember that I was a dead woman walking anyways. Getting sad thoughts out of my head, I began humming the bird call that was just used at the door.

I was looking out the window, so it took me a bit to realized I was begin watched. Not by something outside- thankfully- but by the raised eyebrows of Nowl Flight.

"What?" I said self consious.

"Don't stop, nightingale."

I wanted to question the new nickname, but I opened my mouth and no words came out, only the same song I had been hymming earlier. It seemed to last a long time before Nowl said that we better get going now. Time apparently had flown by, but I followed Nowl upto the rooftop nonetheless.

No one else was up here this time, which made me appreaciate the view a thousand times more. I ran to look over the edge, and giggled breathlissly as the wind flew threw my hair. Suddenly I felt my feet leave the ground and screamed at the top of my lunges. I was picked up wedding style by Nowl, who was laughing, which aggrivated me, "Nowl! I swear to go if you kill me I will haunt you forever! PUT ME DOWN!" His laughing stopped, but he didn't put me down.

"You really think I'd kill you, bird?" he sounded hurt.

I stuttered, "than-than why did you pick me up?" I looked up at his face.

"Just wanted to have some fun," he started spinning me in circles, which reminded me so much of what Flynn had done in the trainning arena that I laughed.

A coughing annoced what our laughter covered up, the alliance had show up. There was an awkward silence as Nowl put me down, then Electra asked, "was it you who invited us up here?"

I fixed my dress, but it was the little red haired Artemis who said, "no, it was me."

Flynn walked over to me and pecked me on the lips, then stood on my side with his arm around me, "what do you want, ging?"

She huffed, then began, "I had an idea, about, about the trainning scores."

"And?" Char said after Artemis had stopped.

Seeing that they were all listening, Artemis began proudly, "I think we should all do poorly on our trainning scores, nothing too obvious, just enough to have people not really care for us."

We all listenned intently, but it was me who spoke first, "that's bloody brillant, Artemis!" in which everyone agreed.

We left soon after that, tired and not talking, because we were too busy thinking about what to do tomorrow now that impressing the gamemakers was not on our list. I was going to show off my sword fighting skills, but now I just felt a little stumped, what would I do? Just sit there?

As I was about to leave my hand was caught in the hallway and I was pulled backwards. Flynn had pulled me so close to him, into a long kiss, when I pulled away he said, "so what's your answer?"

"Answer to what?" I laughed.

"Going out with me?"

"You never asked," I smiled, feeling my stomach twist.

"Well, I am now," he smiled, "Pauper, will you go out with me before we're both brutatly killed?"

"Oh, how romantic!" I laughed, "I couldn't say no to that, so yes."

"Yes?"

"Yeah!" I laughed, and was pulled into another long kiss, but before I closed my eyes for the kiss I saw over Flynn's sholder, a slumped shouldered Nowl Flight walking back to the elevator alone, and I immediatley regretted my decision. Then I remember what Nowl had told me, it was just a kiss for a cover, nothing else. And so I plunged deeper into the kiss.


	16. Chapter 13: Shocking Scores

Twentythree other tributes and I sit in a blande room waiting to be called for training scores after lunch. Everyone's erily silent. I'm sitting on Flynn's lap, figuring that if are cover for an alliance hasn't already been blown by all the flirty in the training sessions, than it for sure had been blown with the kiss in the interview. The good thing was is that dispite Nowl getting rigid around us, he seems rather fine with this, maybe it was just my imagination that he was glum, but he still told me to 'sing a tune, bird' at breakfast, in which I belted a very loud familiar tune.

The thought of last night's plan is still very fresh in my mind, so fresh, that I just want to panic. I haven't got a clue at all what to do- or not to do- to score low. I've thought of just going in there and sitting down, or just sucking at archery, and I even thought of just flashing the judges to be sure of a bad score. Let's hope I don't get that desperate.

Hannah Reede, the depressing but pretty blonde girl from district one was the first to leave, and she left rather glumly, not caring at all what score she gets. With a shock I realized that I shouldn't be caring ethier. I should be right alongside Hannah, not caring about a thing in the world, why all the sudden did I care so much about these games? Why did keep stragetizing before bed, and why am I making a power alliance? With a sad pang I realize why: because I've been making way too many personal attachments when I'm just going to end up dead. I have a boyfriend now for petes shake! Shouldn't I have gone silently into battle, and died saving someone random? I've just made my life so much harder, _all because it feels so good, so new to have these friends. _Maybe if I had had a friend before, I wouldn't be so eager to make friends with everyone I see that just might kill me.

After fifteen minutes Leek Hermon is called, and I shift uncomfortably on Flynn's lap. He pats me on my back, and I try to find that comforting, but it just makes me more panicked. Should I just sword fight anyways and not care if I get a good score? Does Flynn have something planned that I am just not thinking about? How can an alliance of six think of six ideas to get a low score?

After thirty minutes this time Nowl Flight is called, and I shudder. I can't imagine what Leek did that took so long, but judging by his gruesome interview, it couldn't have been pleasant. I also shudder for Nowl, and nerves grip me as I realize I'm next.

Nowl's only takes five minutes, and I silently scowled him for not just sitting there all night so I don't have to be trained, but now it's Pauper Dea Bukater that's being called, and I stand to leave the room, when Flynn pulls me into a goodbye and goodluck kiss, he whispers "see you in the arena," and all I do is nod.

My heels echo on the floor, and I laugh inside at my decision of my outfit. I'm wearing heels, and what seems to be a bad school-girl outfit I asked Paisley to piece together. To be honest, it looked so badass on a movie that I thought I would have fun in it. It reminds me that I shouldn't be doing anything at all in the training arena, because if I sword fight in this, I'm sure my ass would show. I had gotten eyebrows raised by both Nowl, Flynn, and surprisingly the violet eyed boy, but I'm sure it was just a what-the-hell-are-you-wearing-fool look.

A man in black opens the door for me, and I find myself in the training room where I have been praticing, but with a long table situated long the head of the room, with a lot of gamemakers sitting along it, enjoying a feast.

"Ah, from district 2, let's hope _hers_ will be more, _entertaining_," a voice came from a plump graying old man sitting in the head of the table. All I could do was stand in the middle of the room, nerves shot, I had yet to come to a conclusion on what I should do to get low points, and standing here doing nothing was begining to look like a good idea, until the old man talked again, "well, you can begin now,"

_I have to do something, _anything._ C'mon Pauper! You'll be dead in a week, please just do something!_ I begged myself.

And my mind picked one of the things I had thought about earlier, and brought my hands up to my top. I unbuttoned the three buttons holding together my top, and flashed the gamemakers.

Forks clattered as they dropped from mouth, people spluttered, and I just stood their smiling, clearly not thinking about anything. After five long seconds, I redid my buttons, bowed, and exited on the otherside of the room, in shock at what I just did.

Well, at least I'll get low points, maybe even a zero.

I walked slowly upto my room, silently scolding myself. Why couldn't I had just done shitty archery? Why did I just flash all those people? What would my alliance think? I asked myself tones and tones of questions that I didn't want to anwser, and so without realizing it, I was already walking out of the elevator on the second floor.

I desperatly just wanted to go to my room and die, but Mailis had made it clear at breakfast to come staright to a room on our floor with a television where we could watch our results, even though they'd appear later that night, we planned on waiting in there. So I grudedly made my way to that room, hoping that no one would ask what I did with the gamemakers.

But sure enough, as I entered the room, the first thing I heard was, "what'd you do, bird?"

I sat down on the plush three person sofa in between Nowl and Ako, Mailis sitting on the floor, and brought my knees up to my stomach. Hugging them, I tried to speak, but nothing seemed to want to come out of my mouth but a horse wheeze.

"Bird?" he asked.

I still made the wheeing noise, then Mailis said, "was it that bad?" in a non-sympathetic tone, apparently still grudging on the food fight last night.

My words came out in a rush, "Iflashedeveryone!"

"Wha?" Nowl moved his full body to look straight at me, "speak slower, bird."

"I _flashed _them! I just_-just panicked_!"

Three mouths gapped at me, and I covered my face in shame, then after two long seconds, everyone roared with laughter.

"_You're kidding_!" Mailis started.

"What did you do?" I asked Nowl, still keeping my head down.

"I just tyed ropes," he said threw laughing, "as if you flashed the gamemakers!"

Dread filled me, it was incrediably embrassing; but at least I'll get a low score after all.

"It's on!" the blue skinned Ako called to us, tapping his hand on the couch repeatedly in excitment. After a while of constant laughter from Nowl, Mailis, and Ako, it finally died down to a couple random bursts, in which we all got bored, and me, Nowl, and Mailis started to play poker, while Ako stayed glued to the red couch, waiting patiently for eight at night, for the results to appear. We even had our suppers brought in to us to stay in the room.

All three of us ran to the couch, tousing the cards aside. Nowl made it to the couch first, and Mailis second, with no room to sit, I leaped clumsy, and layed across all three of them, with my head on Nowl's lap. Our laughter was cut short as the Capitol athem played on the television.

After the Capitol logo faded away on the television, there was a short introduction by the interviewer, Rustun Flickerman, then on to business. A picture of Leek Hermon appeared first, with district 1 written above the top, and next to him stood his training score number, a big fat number nine. I reajusted myself in nerves, the scores where from zero to twelve, what could Leek have done to get such a high number? The unpleasant thoughts weren't welcome, and I hide them as Hannah Reede, the blonde hair black eyed girl's score appeared on television, next to a pretty impressive seven.

I bit my lip as Nowl's smiling blonde face appeared on television, next to a sad three, "must have been some alright knots," I commented, trying to ease the tension building in me. Next was my smiling picture, a picture they had taken as soon as I arrived at the Capitol. My blonde hair and freckles only held my eyes for two seconds before I looked over and saw a big, two digited number tweleve. I gapped.

"Must have really liked your tits," Mailis laughed, which made me wrapped my arms awkwardly around them.

"The gamemakers are ethier trying to get me targetted, or are huge perverts,"

Silence fell as the four of us realized that it was it would be a feeble hope to wish for the latter.

The blue haired girl, Vail Hedowl, picture was of her sticking out her tough, and was matched with a five, while her counterpart Favian Brito showed a intimadating eight. The second youngest girl in the competion who I had yet to notice, named Beatrice Evans of district five scored a low two. Char, the white haired girl from our alliance followed the low score plans and managed a three, while the gangly blonde Libera scored a four. Fienia Slyox, the red head of district nine, who had been scene with the 'career' alliance had managed to scrape a seven. Another member of the big alliance, Remus Night, a pale skinned, black haired man from district ten scored ten, but his counterpart scored only a one, as part of the alliance, Electra also followed our plan. Thailia, the big girl who I kissed infront of that night we Nowl scored an eleven, which made me naw on my lip again. Finally the last two names appeared, Artemis Hailee was beside a six, with Flynn Venustus finishing the show with a three, just like Nowl.

The Capitol logo and athem came again, and I slowly got up from laying on all three of my partners. It was scary to think that other than my alliance, the lowest score had come from Beatrice, which made the big enemy alliance look so much more intimatdating. I wondered how scary I looked to all these people, it had been years since someone had scored a twelve, and I had been so sure that that would score me a zero. Now I had a huge target on my back, which wasn't so bad, seeing as I'm now aligned with some of the nicest people in this game.

This made me question my place in these games. I was here to kill myself, and now this highest possible score put everything into perpestive. I couldn't align with six other people and put them in danger with me as a huge target. My best bet would be to go play these games alone, this way I could stay hidden until I could find a best time to die for someone. My mind was set, walking into the games tomorrow, I would grab some things and run, far away from my once allies, and try as hard as I could to do anything at all to help good people live, and not be chased after.

"Bird," I looked up, Mailis and Ako were out of the room, already headed off to their rooms, I must have been staring in thought at the turned off television screen. I shook out of my revive, and smiled, thinking that maybe I could enjoy one last night talking to Nowl Flight before I met him again in the arena to save his life.

"Sorry, just thinking," I smiled to him, and brought him to my room. I felt so drained after this day of constant nerves, and I just wanted to sleep. Without taking my school girl outfit off, I jumped under the covers, "stay here tonight?" I questioned on a whim.

He smiled, and jumped into my bed next to me, "of course."

I sleep with dreams full of deaths, and woke up as I flashed someone before getting shot with a start. It was still dark outside, and I blinked to wake myself out of my bad dream, I turned to lay back down, but saw Nowl laying there sleeping deeply. I wanted to wake him up and talk to him. I hated bad dreams, and mixed with the anixety of tomorrow, I just wanted to not be alone right now. I wipped the tears from my eyes that had came from my dream and leaned over to kiss Nowl. I would never see him like this, ever again, and since he was asleep I knew that nothing would be repeated tomorrow. I keep kissing him, lying to myself that he wasn't kissing back. But I felt his lips moving, but his eyes stayed closed. I finally pulled off him, and heard a mumble which sounded like, "I love you, bird,"

I swalled, laying back down beside him and said, "I love you so much Nowl Flight, it hurts."


	17. Chapter 14: The Riddle in the Arena

I woke up to find myself cuddling Nowl Flight, my arm wrapped around him, with my head laying on his chest, and his arm wrapped tightly around me. I didn't move to show that I was awake, sighing happily that I could have a moment before I had to start thinking of the games again. But sadly, Nowl's slow breathing stopped, signaling that he was awake, after a few seconds I relunctatly sat up. I blushed, remebering what I had done last night, past of me wanted despartley for Nowl to remember too and spontanusly kiss me, but the more rational part of me told me that him and I would never be good together, I was already a dead girl.

There was a knock on the door, and I told whoever it was to come in, Mailis walked in, raised her eyebrows but only said, "Nowl, you have to go back to your room now, get ready, then come to er- breakfast" she stayed in the room, a grim look on her face.

Nowl got up, still dressed in yesterday's clothes, I stood up after him, and hugged him goodbye, "I'll see you in the arena," I manged to say, although it felt like he could see threw my lie.

I thought he was about to call me out for looking away as I said that, but instead he said, "I had a funny dream last night,"

Oh no, here it was, I had to stop this, I would only be selfish for me to fall in love with him, quickly thinking I came up with a lie, "me too, I turned into an octopus."

He blinked, but thankfully seemed to come to the conclusion that his was a dream too, "I dreamed of a lot of death and stuff, but ya know, turning into an octopus is cool too," he smile feebly and I tried to return it. I hugged him one more time, "bye, bird."

Nowl left the room, after letting my eyes linger into the hallway for a while, I turned to Mailis, who still had the grim look on her face. I sighed, "any words of wisdom before I do this?"

"Go and shower- it might be your last," her face pressed into a hard line, "oh, and don't do what I did, you'll regret it." I nodded and went to go shower, but she spoke again, "should I still send all the sponsor gifts to Nowl?"

I stopped but didn't turn around once I made it to the bathroom door, "yeah, try and spend a lot too. He's good with hints, send him clues if you can," I closed the door to the bathroom, signalling for Mailis to leave.

After my shower I dressed in the outfit the tributes would all be wearing into the arena. A black tank top, pared with hunter green cargo pants, a brown belt, and quite chunky boots.

Breakfast seemed like a blur, Ako and Mailis, both grim faced where speaking in monotones of ways to stay alive in the arena. Hide until the end, don't put too much faith in our alliance, trust no one. Then we made our way to the cars that will take us away to the arena, where I said my last goodbyes to Nowl, but it was rushed out, and I didn't say anything true in my goodbye words at all, anything about my alliance was now a lie, and meeting up in the arena could even be a small possiblity for us. When I finally stepped out of the car and was ushered into a concrete building, let's just say I wasn't in a good mood.

It felt like a hand gripped my heart and didn't want to let go. Mailis closed the door behind her to a room with nothing but a small podium. I glupped my dry throat, and turned to Mailis, and my eyes popped. She was crying. This girl who had always been so hard faced, and who was strong was standing here, looking at me, crying.

"I-I'm sorry," she spluttered, wipping the tears from her brown eyes, "j-just, I've n-never met anyone- j-just you remind me s-so much of m-me!"

I embraced her, not used to comforting the sad, "it's okay,"

She hugged me, but pulled away, keeping her arms on my shoulders so sniffed, "I k-know that you're going in there for, I k-know you want to k-kill yourself for someone e-else, Pauper," her voice broke as she spluttered, "I, I did too, b-but I was a coward, and k-killed so-so many people, d-don't do what I did, and d-don't kill Nowl,"

I blinked, I had never once thought of killing Nowl, but seeing as she must have never thought of killing her counterpart when she was in the games, Junis, until she became so scared of death. People lose their mind in the had never occured to me before that Mailis was one of those people.

My voice was horse and scrathy, but I managed to whisper, "I won't" from my too dry throat.

Stepping onto the small circular podium, I held my breath. A glass chamber came down upon me, making me feel so, so clasterphobic. I stared at Mailis, trying to slow down my breath that was skyrocketing. We just stared at each other, silent tears streaming down her, and after a long pause I starting to slowly raise.

It was pitch black for a second, then light blinded me. I blinked to ajust my view. I had sixty seconds to make a plan, to wait on my podium sarounded by all these people whom I have gotten to know over the past week, the twenty-three other tributes.

It looked as though we were in a clearing in a forest. Sunlight mocked the grim mood as it appeared through the trees up above, but I pried my eyes away from the sky to see the giant infamous golden cornucopia. I knew from watching the Hunger Games all my life that the best weapons, equiment, and such would be located in the center of the cornucopia. Around it was the lesser valued supplies, another pair of boots stood fairly close to me, so did a marker, a pink backpack, and a lighter. I had previously planned to go in and get supplies from the cornucopia. It only made sense, I was not breed for survial, seeing as I come from district two, but I was breed for a fight. I needed a sword, and just as I thought that I heard a huge blast, everyone jumped. Pieces varying in size of what seemed to once have been a person was now littered all through the clearing. I quickly looked away, it was obvious that whoever this person was walked off the podium before the long sixty seconds was up. If it was because they were suicidal or impatient, I guess we'll never know. A quick glance around tells me that everyone from my alliance is still in their previous positions.

And the gong sounds. Spending more time looking at the objects around me, I never looked for a targetted prize, but that didn't stop me from running, as fast as I could, twoards the center of the clearly. My senses heightened in the presence of death, I saw many people fleeing from the corner of my eye. I had made it second to the cornucopia, but whoever was beside me wasn't planning on staying long, which didn't bother me. They grabbed an axe and a backpack and booked it. There was so many items in the cornocupia, but the silver gleaming sword caught my attention. I grabbed the handle and pulled it swiftly out of the rubble. I looked up to see that the battle around me had begun. People were picking up random weapons and just whipping them at each other.

I was staring at the young Beatrice Evans, who had stupidly ran into the cornucopia, when a knife hit her in the heart. I stood transfixed as she looked down to see what had happened, them like a ragdoll, flopped to the ground. I wanted to help her, but now my eyes made my way from her to her attacker, the blonde district one tribute, Leek. We caught eyes, and my body screamed_ run_, but I couldn't move.

It seemed to happen in slow motion, Leek bent down to pick up another knife, I saw him wind up and let go of it, but just as he let go, someone came from the side of me and tackled me down sideways.

"Go!" Flynn screamed, rolling off me and standing up, "_go_!"

I didn't need telling twice, I turned onto my stomach as Flynn jumped up, my hand conveinantly coming in contact with the lighter that was beside me earlier. I looked up to see the bright pink backpack right in front of me, and a blonde hair, gangly body of someone I knew just beyond that. But I pushed myself off the ground, and grabbed hold of the backpack in the same hand of the lighter, and ran as fast as I could. As I reached the edge of the forest I didn't turn back, knowing that I was too lucky to have made it out of there alive, and that I didn't want to see anyone else I knew dead.

I kept running and running, jumping over obsticals of tree trunks and rocks, I ran for a long time until I didn't jump high enough and caught my foot on a tree branch. I hit the ground face first, my hands too busy holding my backpack, lighter, and sword to stop it. I spat dirt out of my mouth, but when I looked up, I realized that I hit my head pretty hard.

There was a quant little house, that looked rather abandoned just built right into the forest. It had a large balcony, and was made out of wood. I pushed myself up without letting my eyes leave the house. I knew that this would be a great place to sleep, there'd probably be a bed in there, it has a chimney, which means that it has a fireplace for warmth, and it might even have food inside, but there was one big problem: someone else coming across a house in the arena will have thought the same thing as I just did, therefore, it wouldn't be a good place to hide. I walked slowly upto the porch, for all I knew there could be someone already inside the house, but from the layer of dust on the porch, there couldn't have been.

I made my way up the stairs, and turned the doorknob into the thankfully unlocked house. Not that it being locked would have mattered much, seeing as breaking down a door wouldn't be frowned upon in this arena. Opening the door, my eyebrow raised, it looked so normal in the middle of this arena. The house inside was rather nicely decorated with red couchs and chairs situated around an empty fireplace, three doors marked ways into other rooms, but at that moment I heard canons firing. One..two..three..four..five..six..seven..eight...nine.. and silence. It looked like the bloodbath at the cornucopia was over. I knew of two deaths for sure, Beatrice Evans, and poor gangly Libera, who was suppose to be apart the alliance I left behind. A third death could be Leek, or Flynn, since both were at the scene... but no. I couldn't think what ifs right now, I would see who all died tonight in the sky.

I swallowed the lump in my throat and began my search of the house. I could take objects out of this house, but so far in the main room nothing seemed appatizing enough to fit in my backpack, even thought it is a rather large bag, the couch or chair wouldn't fit. I walked over to the first door on the left, and opened it, finding myself in a bedroom. There was two single beds for the people dumb enough to want to stay the night. The silence begin alone made me feel eerly, but I thought about what was worth taking. I picked up a white and burgandy quilted blanket off the bed, not caring that it would signal that someone had already been in the house- I would be long gone by the time someone appeared- and folded it neatly. I put down my objects on the bed, ready to take a few seconds to see what I had in my bag. The large backpack was more of a duffel bag, it held a full water bottle, a good amount of granola bars, beef jerky, packets of noodles, packets of soup, a rope, and thankfully a small tent. I threw the lighter in the bag, and the blanket, and zipped it back up. I could take a pillow, but that seemed to be something too big to carry around, but I did take a pillow case, incase I need something else to use as a bag.

I've been walking rather sleathly in the house, but don't really feel the need too. If anyone were to appear, I'd hear them approach, giving me time to escape, or prepare to defend myself with my sword. I walked out of the first room, into the second. The bathroom was rather small, it had a bath and shower combined, a sink, and a toliet. Figuring it could be a long time before I see one of these again, I pee, drink from the tap, and take a roll of toliet paper, I take out the middle cardboard, and smush it so that it fits in my bag with room for more items. I also took the soap. Walking out of the second room, I feel like I've rather greedy, or maybe just really lucky to have been the one to find this house in the first place, but walking into the third room, I feel like this house was the best blessing for anyone in the arena.

Upon the counter there's tons of food. Bags of chips, apples, boxes of cereral, more soup mixes, boxes of crackers, granola bars, cans of pasta, pastries, every possible food item. I run over to it, and grab a bag of chips, but stop myself. These could easily all be laced with poison. For the first time, I see an envelope resting in the center of the display, a pale blue color, but stamped by the Capitol logo. I grab it, open it, and begin ready what seems to be a poem.

_Gaze upon these treasures without greed,_

_For while we all must feed,_

_Poison is lurking amongst the feast._

_Put down those you wish to eat if it contains any yeast,_

_And do not dare take what you can not preserve,_

_For it is not what you deserve._

_What will cause a certain death,_

_Is luxury foods that will take away your breath._

_Forwarned you now find yourself,_

_Be cautious as you take from this shelf._

I blinked the words, it was clearly a riddle, a riddle that without would have been the difference of life of death. Of course they'd put a riddle in the arena, to see if they could weed out the brainy and kill the brawn. Thankfully, this riddle was poorly written and easy to disifier. I read it over again as I looked down at what was on the shelf. A good idea would be to just leave the food here, but it wasn't named the Hunger Games for a reason, the food I have now would only last a bit. The bag of chips I had first wanted is considered a luxury food, as they are priced high in most district, therefore I can't take them. Any cakes or pastries had to be counted out aswell, because there defidently is yeast in them. Fruits and vegetables can't be perserved, so no I won't be taking them. I felt like this was taking more time than nessary, but I figured out that I can have a few things. So I grabbed the cereral, which I threw away the box from, and put in my bag. I also grabbed a box of crackers, soup mix and more jerky. I also grab a pan to boil water in, and to cook the soup.

I began to get anxious, someone could be coming around here very soon, and who wouldn't want to raid it? I have been in the house too long. I opened the fridge for a quick look, but sadly there was another envelope in there, and I didn't have the time for this. I felt randomly panicked, and needed to leave, now.

To be safe, I slip out the opened window, this way it looked as though someone never left the house with the foot prints on the dusty balcony only tralling in. My feet hit the ground as another canon roared, sending chills down my spine.

I need to get away from this house, it's only going to attract fights and death. I walk straight for a long while, then randomly turned right. This forest seemed to stretch on forever, but I still wanted to explore my surrondings. I stop for lunch to much on a beef jerky and some crackers. It became dark by the time anything interesting happened.

In the distance, I saw what could only be one thing. Another house, but this one was made of brick, and had two stories. A third difference was that this house was inhabited, the chimney billowing smoke.

At first I was tempted to try my alliance's bird call, but I had made the decision to break away from them, therefore I knew better than to stay around. I turned right again walked along ways away from the house. After another long period of walking I came to a tiny clearly that looked quite deserted. I would be camping here tonight.

I put down my heavy backpack and unzipped it to get the tent from inside. Setting up the small tent was fairly easy, but for added protection I'm camflaguing the tent in branchs, and leaves. It's during my camoflaguing period that the sky lights up, and the Capitol athem plays loudly. I look up to see the same Capitol logo that was on the envelope that contained the riddle eariler today, then it fades to the smiling face of a girl from district three who I never met. Then comes her counterpart of district three. Next is Beatrice Evans. I try hard not to think of how she was the first thing since my goldfish to see die. Then the face district six male I know as Char's counterpart flashes in the sky. Two district seven tributes are gone, followed by the smiling, beautil face of Libera. I absentmindly rub my heart for comfort. Lastly, a young boy from district nine's grim face disappears. The logo comes again, and so does the athem.

As bad as I feel for all of the dead, I feel happy that most of my alliance survived. Flynn's face did not appear, although nethier did Leek's. But hopefully my once alliance is together, surving on their own without me. I can't help but wonder where they are, where Nowl Flight is, and if he's as relived to not see my face as I am to not see his.

Finally finishing my camoflague tent, I make my way inside, and pull out the stole blanket, then wrap myself up in it. It's been since lunchtime since I last ate, so I open my cereal and eat quite a bit, figuring that I have a lot of food, and will end up hunting sometime soon anyways. I lay down, making a make-shift pillow of of my blanket, and think that for someone who went into this game as suicide, I was sure having a way too easy time compared to past tributes. I can't help thinking that I should have jumped in front of Beatrice before the knife hit her, but of course, I didn't see the knife being thron. I always should have found a way to save Libera, she was such a nice girl, and Electra, her best friend in the games, is probably crying herself to sleep tonight. But I know that these deaths were out of my reach to help control. I would give my life for someone in this arena, before everyone else died out.


	18. Chapter 15: Bloody Staircases

There was a hard and cold wind last night. It rattled my tent, shaking off most of my camoflague, and rattled me too. I put my boots back on for extra warmth, and tried to curl as tightly as I could in a ball. Let's just say, it wasn't the best sleep of my life. So I woke up groggy and disoriented, and almost forgot where I was until I saw my hand still clutching a silver sword handle. What if I had jerked in the middle of the night and stabbed myself? _It'd be one less person for people to kill_, I thought bitterly.

After the cold night, the weather seemed to completly flip, it was a beuatiful day out. I packed up the tent easily, and put it in the bottom of my backpack, I lifted out my water bottle and noticed that it was running low, which isn't a good thing in the arena, but a common one. Without water, you're nothing. After my hours and hours of walking yesterday, I hadn't even been close to finding water, except for in the house. What if the only source of water was in houses? As much as I didn't want to admit it, but it seemed very likely. Round up the tributes in these houses for faster and more brutal killings.

With my mind set to visit the house I had pasted last night, I drank the rest of my water, and ate more cereal. I had plenty of noodle and soup packets- some that I stole from the house, and some that came with my backpack- but these were something more that I needed water for. Without further adeu, I packed up the rest of my stuff, stuffed my sword in my belt lop, and began walking to the house that was habited last night.

It was a long walk, almost an hour to get to the house, but I was more surprised with how I remembered it's exsact location rather than how these boots were giving me blisters. But walking closer to the house, I stopped dead in my tracks. The door was broken down, and not a happy broken down ethier, if there was such a thing. I listened intently for anything that might say that there is people still alive inside. There wasn't a sound, which told me that whoever broke down the door was long gone. I couldn't help but think that whoever it was that made camp in the house was very, very stupid. I hope it wasn't my alliance. But it easily could have been, most of them ran from the cornucopia, so they wouldn't be fortunate enough to get a tent, or even a sleeping bag. The ones that stayed for the bloodshed in the alliance were Libera and Flynn, and Flynn couldn't have made it out with much because he was too busy saving me.

I made up my mind to check out the house, it might be a clue of what happened, or who was there, but also, I really needed to restock on water. I walk up the stone steps to the red brick, two story house, and immediatly didn't like what I see. The hardwood door is broken down, on the inside it looked like someone had tried to baracade the door with furniture of all sorts, dark red chairs and oak tables lay scattered all around, showing that whoever was trying to break in had been successful. Why hadn't they just broke into the windows? It would have been a lot easier. I stepped in the path made by whomever broke in, the path that led straight upstairs. Whoever choose to carpet these stairs in white was very sick as the blood on it stood out very well.

Blood stained the carpet, it looked like whoever had been injured had been dragged upstairs, whether this meant that their was more than one person in this house on someones side, or that the killer was playing with it's hunt. A cold shiver ran down my back, but I continued my way up the stairs, trying to step around the blood.

The hallway had even more blood, which still looked like it was begin dragged into a sideroom. The door wasn't broken down this time, which gave me the impression that they didn't have time to. This bedroom was clearly the place of the final battle; pieces of a broken lamp lay mixed with blood, one bed thrown sideways, with no blankets on ethier bed. There was so much blood. Someone died here. If they were alive, it couldn't be for much longer. I held my breath and made my way to the bathroom across the hall. It looked like it could have been in a different house entirely, the bathroom looked spotless, I threw down my backpack to get our my water bottle to fill it up, not wanting to stay here much longer.

Turning off the tap, I put my water back in my backpack, but when I turned around I heard something that didn't sound good. Footsteps. My heart stopped, then started up beating a thousand times a second. I quietly took the sword out of my belt loop, and held it out in front of me.

I had my sword ready just in time, for Leek, the dirty blonde muscle figure of him appeared in my door way, "well," he began, "I'll have the pleasure of killing you, too."

He looked like he had just been in that fight, there was a bloody bump on his head, bruises were all over his body, including a black eye, and he was cut badly in the arm, but this only took a second to gather as courage grew inside me, "you're saying that to the girl with the sword?"

This stumped him, he took a couple of seconds, panting breath, then said "why don't we make an alliance, baby?" _Baby_, oh, he had just dug his own grave. I hate the word baby with all my heart. Calif calls me baby, and it's degarding. The way Leek says it is just the same as Calif does. Like he wants something from me.

I laughed, I could easily kill him now, but he knew who was here, and I wanted to know who he had killed, it was foolish, but I kept the conversation going, "oh, _honey_, I don't think an alliance will work for me,"

He spoke to my sword, "but we'd be _so_ good together, I kill rather well,"

"Who'd you kill so far?" I asked in my most casual voice.

He raised his eyebrow, apparently thinking that I was considering his offer, "many nameless people, the pair from district three, the pair from seven, a few more randoms, and I just finished off a white haired girl before I was knocked out,"

_Char, oh no not Char_, I kept a straight impassive face, but on the inside I just wanted to cry. Him killing Char meant that it had been my old alliance that had stayed here, where were they now? Injured and alone? No, I couldn't think like this, I needed to keep my mind on my conversation, "hmm, that's a hefty amount,"

"It would be more if your boyfriend would stop interfering," he sneered the words, this cause me to raise my eyebrows.

Never lowering my sword this hole time, I jerked it up, which Leek's eyes followed, "my boyfriend is brave, and will stop plenty more of your kills,"

It was his turn to laugh, "not if I get him first,"

Whether it was his laugh or his words that made me snap, I'm not sure, but with that I jabbed my sword straight at him. He was expecting this, as he dove quickly to the left, out of my view. I ran out the bathroom door right into his fist. I fell down, but with ardenaline pumping threw me I managed to fall on my ass, then stab straight up. It was a discusting noise as my sword collided with his kneecap. He buckled and fell down right ontop of me. I tried pushed myself out from under him, but he cried out from pain and in retaliation bite me hard on my arm near my wrist. I screamed and kicked him in the jaw, then as he put his hands to his face I stood up, and unshed the sword from his knee. He screamed in angony, and I knew that now was the time to kill him, just to put him out of this pain. I aimed my sword, but closed my eyes and I stabbed him in the heart. A canon went off loudly signalling his death, and I pulled my sword from him for a second time.

I was panting, and out of breath. My arm hurt really bad were he bit me, and my cheekbone was incrediably swore, yet it was my heart that hurt the most. Would Char had survived if I had just stayed with my alliance? She was so smart, and quiet, and beautiful, why must the good die young?

I went back into the bathroom to grab my stuff, and made it downstairs when I thought about how much I never wanted to come back into a house again. I made my way into the kitchen, in hopes of finding another container to hold more water in, but yet again I heard noises coming in this house.

"Rior! No!" it was a young male's voice coming from the kitchen. I lended aganst the door to listen in more, to quiet myself, and see if these people were any threat. "Rior, please, no!" The voice was crying, and for some stupid reason I opened the door. Someone needed my help.

There was a young boy laying across the floor, gasping for breath, with a bag of potato chips still clutched in his hand. An even younger boy was staring wideeyed at me, he was kneeling on the ground a hand on what had to be Rior's gasping chest.

"There was posion in the chips," I explained breathlessly, "I-I'm sorry, there's nothing we can do,"

The boy blinked, obviously terrified of me.

"I won't hurt you," but his eyes went to the blood filled sword still clutched in my hands, "oh, right," I nodded then made my way to the kitchen sink, turned on the tap and washed Leek's blood of my sword.

"W-why aren't you going to kill me?" the boy spluttered out.

I was drying off my paper towel as I thought of what he asked, but as I opened my mouth to say something a canon went off, I looked down to see Rior had stopped gasping for breath, I whispered "close his eyes,"

The little brunette child did as I said, then began crying silently.

He looked so hopeless, I had to help him. I opened the cuborads under the sink to see that there was everything someone would find in a real house, like cleaners and a dishsoap, I closed that cupboard and began opening all the other cupboards, then finally I found them. In the back of the cup cupboard there was six water bottles, all just waiting to be used. There was no envelope around them, so hopefully there wouldn't be any posion laced with them.

"What's your name?" I asked as I turned back on the tap, and starting filling up the four water bottles.

"Dell," he said then asked, "what are you doing?"

I screwed on the last lid, then kneld over my backpack, looking for the pillowcase inside "I'm helping you."

"Why?"

I grabbed hold of the pillow case, put two water bottles in my backpack zipped it back up, "good question,"

Pushing myself off the floor, I walked over to the counter and put the two other water bottles inside of it, then stood facing the pile of poison and nonpoisoned food, "you can only eat the perservable, non yeast, and non luxury food that's given, the rest is poison."

"Did you kill someone?" he demanded bluntly, then realized how forceful he sounded, changing his voice tone he began again "because I heard fighting upstairs, but Rior ws hungry so we went in anyways."

I kept my eyes on gathering food for Dell, throwing granola bars, crackers, and jerky into the now almost full pillow case I sighed, "yeah, I did. But he killed a lot of people first."

I think Dell already knew that I killed someone because this news didn't affect him, he just kept his eyes on me as I pulled out a kitchen knife from a drawer. "Here, this pillow case is for you, so you can survive, this knife" I handed him the knife, "is for your protection, use it for hunting, and- and keeping alive," I walked over to the counter and put my sword back in my belt lop, then grabbed an extra box of granola bars, stuffed them in my bag, and sighed.

"Stay right here- I'm gonna go and get you a blanket from upstairs," as much as I didn't want to walk back up those bloody stairs I knew that Dell wouldn't survive without a blanket, so I stepped up to the landing where Leek's body was gone. This first scared me, is he like, the terminator? But then sense clued in that the gamemakers have ways of removing bodies from the games. I opened the door at the end of the hall, and sure enough there was a master room with a comforter. I took it off the bed and rolled it into a ball, not wanting to drag it on the blood as I made my way back into the kitchen.

Dell was thankfully still there, he hadn't moved an inch from when I left, but apparently they had removed Rior's body aswell, "here," I said, passing him the blanket, "you're going to have to carry it because the pillow case won't hold it, but other than that, you're set,"

He looked at me reproachfully, but then a smile broke across his thin lips, "thank you."

I smiled back, "you're welcome," and then turned around to head back out the broken down door.

There could be a thousand reasons why I helped Dell. He had just lost a friend, he was so young, he wouldn't have lasted much longer without it, but, as I walk far away from the house, I keep thinking that the number one reason was that I could save a life, as I had just killed one. I did it for Char, for Libera, for the pair from distrcit three, and everyone else who had died in this arena. I just wanted to make things right.

I marched on and on for a very long time, I stopped once for lunch, where I boiled soup and rather enjoyed it, then continued walking. I passed two houses, each different than the others, but both were unoccupied, and I have enough supplies. So I continued to walk long until the sun fell. Finally I figured that I had put plenty of distance from me and the other tributes, so I put up my tent in a very small clearly, and camoflaugued it again tonight. I looked up at the sky to see more faces flash across, Leek, who I had killed, Rior, who had been from district five, then Char's pretty face sweeps by, it ends there by doing quick math I realize that it has come down to eleven of us. I needed to find someone to die for and quick, tomorrow I would look for my alliance, it was now time to met up with them. It had been a very long day, but I still went to sleep feeling like I had it too good in this arena compared to the others. I feel asleep counting everyone who was left in this arena, Hannah Reede, Nowl Flight, the blue haired girl, the violet eyed boy, district nine girl, Remus Night, Electra Rospher, Dell, Thailia, Artemis Hailee, and Flynn Venustus, but ended wondering where Nowl flight was spending this night.


	19. Chapter 16: Tickles and Stabbings

Another cold night gone. The sun is barely just beginning to rise as I set out of the tent. It's bitterly cold, the opposite of yesterday, and there's a strong wind. My body aches a bit from all the walking it's been doing, and as much as I want to start looking for my old alliance I'm against leaving so fast. Therefore I trot back into my tent, rolling my body up in my blanket, and start eating some jerky for protein, and a granola bar. I'm still hungry, so I decide on starting a fire and making some soup.

It's really windy outside but thankfully I don't need to wander far for branches to make my fire. Once I have everything set I use my lighter to start it, making the air hot. I boil water in my loted pot, and drink soup that warms me up from head to toe. I am complelty content as I to pack up my campsite.

But once I'm all packed up I realize that I have no idea where to start looking for them. I am far, far away from the house that had once inhabited my alliance, and this arena is so huge they could be anywhere. I sigh, I really should just walk around and hope for the best. And with that resolve, I set off.

The wind still roared long after I stopped the second time a break. The sun straight overhead told me it was around reason I stopped? I was now hanging upside down by my ankle. I dropped my sword that was in my hand and screamed in shoke, then soon realized that I had just alerted whoever set up this trap.

Whomever was approaching wasn't very light on their feet. Then again, I guess they didn't care about stelth since there was no way I could run. Not that I didn't try. I threw my backpack off my sholuder to be lighter, then sung my arms to make my whole upside down body look like a playground swing, the blood rushes to my head even more rapidly, and the heavy footsteps grew closer, but I keep swinging my body, gaining more air. Two things happened at once, the person who was walking has made it to where I was, then stopped, and as for me, the rope tied to the tree and my ankle just snapped, which would have been great if if weren't for the fact that I was launched into the air by my own swinging.

Even better, I landed on top of the person who had come to kill their trap, knocking them off their feet. They let out a grunt, then tried to roll onto their back with me still on top of them. Adrenaline pumping threw my veins, I quickly startled the man. It wasn't a very friendly face, but it was the handsome face of the violet eyed, tanned skinned, Favian Brito. He was from distrcit four, which made sense that this rope trap came from him. But what stood out most about him was the fact that he was in the career alliance.

Our eyes locked for a split second, purple on brown, then they both flashed over to a knife that had been thrown from Favian as I had flew on him. It was laying peacefully in the grass, oblivous to the fact that it would kill someone soon. We both locked eyes from another second, then I jumped up from stratling from him to and threw myself to the knife, and he was two seconds behind me. We pushed and shoved each other along the way, trying to grab the knife. And just when I thought I had it, I laughed once, then he began tickling me.

There's this thing about tickling me, don't do it. I will scream and thrash and punch and fail until you stop tickling me. I hate it. Cal learned very soon that in no way was flirty tickling sessions fun, or romantic, as they always resulted in him getting very much hurt. So as this boy began to tickle my stomach, I may be laughing, but I was getting ready to kill someone again.

I could have just knifed him, but instead I threw away the knife, still laughing hyterically, then grabbed him tightly by his curly jet black hair.

"STOP-" I gasped threw laughing, "FUCKING- TICKLING- MEEE!" I pulled back hard on his hair, and thankfully he stopped tickling me.

"Okay," he laughed, "okay!"

I let go of his hair and tried to catch my breath, but he just kept laughing, which made me laugh even more. I don't know how long we laughed for, but it felt really good to laugh. I felt hysterical. Crazy even. But who was there to tell me that I couldn't laugh with this stranger who was suppose to kill me? Sanity was gone the moment he began tickling me.

Finally our breaths slowed down, and we were just laying there on the ground, smiles on our lips. We caught our breaths for a bit, then it felt like time for words, "I'm not going to kill you," I said, and knew the truth in my words. Mailis had told me to not kill those who don't deserve it.

He breathed for a bit, then mumbled, "I won't kill you ethier,"

My abs ached from laughing, but I managed to stand and walk over to my backpack. Favian got up too, and went to grab his knife. I didn't panic at this- Favian and I had made some sort of silent connection that is unseen of in these games. My backpack slung over my bag, and my sword back in my hand I sighed.

We stood starring at each other again, a wide berth in between us, "may the odds be in your favor," he told me.

I laughed, "they aren't, they never are, and they never will be, so if it comes down to me and you, well, I'll die happily,"

His expression made me sigh, he was confused, "why?"

"I died a long time ago- it seems like the day I began living was the day I tried to commit suicide, the day I volunteered."

His expression change slightly, his eye brows raised.

"I just came in to save someone else from dieing," I smiled, "I don't plan on making it out alive."

"But why'd you fight me?"

"Oh, I don't plan on going out like that, I'm gonna go out with a bang," and with that, I set off again, far away from the violet eyed boy whom had taught me how to laugh again in such a short period of time. With the wind still trying to rip trees from the ground I was surprised that I heard a cannon sound. I stop walking, then silently prayed that it wasn't Favian. With my luck it was.

I tried to shake off the bad thoughts but they just kept coming. My friends were still out there. Most of them. Poor white haired Char and poor gangly Libera. I willed myself to keep walking, but my knees just stayed locked, not wanting to move.

Tears came. Hot and fast. They trickled down my face and my breathing speed up. Why was I having this break down? I am so stupid and weak and I suck. My mind lurched onto my previous thought, 'with my luck', why did I always have such bad luck? Why had I been born into a rich family who tried to raise me to stand in line, why had my father just got up and left me, why did my few days of freedom stop because of my mom, why did Calif put me down so much,_ why did all these good people have to die? _And why do I keep being told that all I am is pretty. I am so much more than that.

So much more.

If this waterfall of emotions wasn't bad enough, my feet started again. I guess they wanted to check and see if I had really bad luck, because you see, they went in the direction where I came from, back to where I could see the violet eyed boy dead.

Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.

I sprinted faster than I had at the cornucopia. My legs seemed to be in control because my mind had switch in a quick flash from extreme sadness to extremely angry. My head was so flustered with bad thoughts. I came quickly to the edge of the clearing, a full battle was roaring in front of me, and there was a body laying on the other side of the battle- a red haired corspe that stopped my legs and my heart.

No, no, no, no, no. It couldn't be, too young, too smart. It couldn't be the mastermind Artemis, she couldn't be died. But the body was too big. It couldn't be her.

Reality suddenly kicked me hard in the gut. There was a _battle_ taking place in front of me! Thailia Rush and Remus Knight- of the bad side of my view of the games- were taking on a blue haired girl who was holding her ground very well for someone who was using a frying pan as a weapon. In another battle in the clearling was the very same black haired boy who had just tickled me, and he was in a crazy knife fight with none other than well, my boyfriend. Flynn Venustus. My heart jumped again at the sight of him. I hadn't realized how much I missed him, which was weird. A second later I realized that gasping "Flynn!" was a bad idea.

His eyes flew to me for a flash of a second, and in that flash Favian stabbed Flynn in the hip.

A blood red scream filled the air, which came from me. Favian pulled the now bloodly knife out of Flynn and he fell down. The fight next to us didn't stop, the blue haired Vail keep strong. Favian looked over at me, not bothering to finish his apponnant. He dropped his knife which landed silently on the leaves.

Why wasn't he finishing Flynn off? Why was he just letting him suffer? Anger boiled more in me, part of me wanted to run and help Flynn, but the other part acted quicker. I threw my backpack on the ground, walked straight upto Favian and punched him in the nose.

It was insanely gross to feel a nose break beneath my fingers. I shook and shook my now pained hand as Favian grabbed his nose in agony, for some weird reason I blinked and said, "sorry."

I turned to help Flynn, who had watched everything that just happend with a confused face, "you had a sword, you know," his breathing was heavy and I tried not to notice. There was sounds coming behind us from the battle, frying pan hitting swords.

"Can you walk?" I asked him.

He looked down, bit his lip, but said, "we have to run, I can run."

"Now!" I bellowed, but helped him up. Favian was still just standing there, apparently in shock of stabbing Flynn. I wasn't looking forward to when he snapped out of his revere, so I grabbed my backpack and began running.

Flynn was running very well for someone who was just stabbed in the hip. I could only imagine how much it hurt to keep running, but he keeped the same speed as me, although all he had was a knife and I had twenty pounds of survival kit on my back. We both looked over at each other, our eyes connected, and he held out his hand. We kept running hand in hand for a long time.

Finally we stopped, my body hurt really bad from running, and after two seconds of trying to gasp from a breath Flynn fell at my side and fainted.

Anyways, it hadn't really been a good day in the arena. Although, was there even such a thing?


	20. Chapter 17: Badger Breakfasts

"Where- what- huh?"

He blinked his eyes in confusion, then I tackled him with a bear hug.

"Ow!" Flynn bellowed, but didn't hugged me back tightly, even though I tried to move away to not hurt him and apologized, but he just held me tighter.

After a bit he let go, and I was the one who had to blink slowly. After Flynn had fainted yesterday I did everything I could to wake him up, but after he really wouldn't wake up I became mother hen. Meaning that I had set up the tent, dragged Flynn inside, treated his wound, gazed it up with the supplies I had taken from one of the houses awhile back, and made him as comfy as possible. At night the only death that had appeared was the red-haired girl from district nine, who was thankfully not Artemis. So apparently blue haired Vail had made it out of her battle, but was she somewhere dying? I closed my eyes and hoped not. I waited and waited for Flynn to wake up, but finally I feel asleep nuzzling against him for warmth. I had woken up only two minutes before he did.

"What happened?" he asked.

"You fainted," I shrugged, and tried to ask nacholantly, "so... where's the rest of the alliance?"

Flynn attempted to get up, but couldn't because of his wound, so he just layed awkwardly and moved his head, "why should you care? You left us."

I grimaced, but felt bad. If I had stayed with my preplanned alliance would Char still be alive? Pursing my lips, I figured that more would be dead if I had stayed, "I only left to protect all of you. I have to big a target on my back,"

He sighed, "I know, but I was frickin worried about you- most of us were," this made my eyebrows raise, but I tried not to get my hopes up on who else of the alliance was worried, "so you want to hear what happened?"

I nodded eagerly.

"Well after I saved your cute ass at the cornucopia me and Leek battled for a while. The rest of the alliance- Artemis, Char, Electra, and Nowl- where together just in the forest, Nowl finally came up behind Leek and knocked him out with a frying pan," he smirked at remembering the tale, "then we started walking for a long, long time, and came to a house! A house in the middle of the arena! We thought against it, but figured that we had a good defense going." He blinked repetivily and sighed, "she was on guard duty that morning, we all feel asleep by the fire in the living room and woke up early morning to her screaming for us to wake up. Char, you know,"

I nodded again, and absentmindely rubbed my heart.

"We all started to panic, like, we could see Leek, Thailia, that girl who just died, that black haired creepy kid-Remus, I think- and that guy who just stabbed me, from the window- a huge ambush. Thailia shot a bullet threw the window at me- I thought I was a dead boy- but it just bounced right off, she even had to duck to not get shot! We all looked so relived that we might have a chance until well, a bullet came trow the door, and we knew that that wasn't so bullet proof. So we started to baracade the door- everything in sight we tossed to the door. I told everyone to leave threw the back door, Electra and Artemis made it, but Char and Nowl where in the living room still pulling more stuff when a bullet made it's way threw the doorknob and well," he swallowed, and his voice went off key, "into Char."

I layed down beside him and stared up at the ceiling. I didn't like this story, I hated sad stories. I liked stories with happily ever afters, and since I knew the ending of this one I didn't care to hear anymore. My throat was too clench to tell him to stop, so he started back up again.

"Leek- that muscular steriod freak- started making his way into the house, I ran to the back door to see that the rest of Leek's alliance was running after Electra and Artemis, so we couldn't leave using the back door, so we pulled a stupid horror movie move and ran upstairs. Nowl carried Char upstairs, she wasn't dead, the bullet only got her in the leg, and he wouldn't leave her. We went into the first room and couldn't even close the door because Leek came bolting in so fast. He threw his only knife and it completly missed! But stupid Char stood up and punched Leek in the face! He was totally shocked, but then began strangling her. Nowl tried to pull him off her but he had a good grip, I grabbed the nearest thing and smashed the lamp on his head, and knocked him out. Char was losing a lot of blood, so s-she- she just-" his voice broke again, "she was gasping for breath and fell to the floor, and-and, Leek's knife was there, and she, she put it into her _heart_."

I wiped away my tears, she died by killing herself, the last final blow was hers. So Leek hadn't killed her, but had put her into agony which made her kill herself. I didn't know why, but this made me feel better. Leek didn't deserve to kill anyone, he didn't deserve the glory in district one that he'd recieve for the kills he made.

"Me and Nowl took the blanket and kinda parcheted out the window..." a trace of a smile played on his lips, "I mean, we didn't want to go downstairs, and there could have been people there so."

"So Electra and Artemis are together somewhere, but what about Nowl?"

"Well, we can't be sure they're even together, and me and Nowl... Well, we didn't last as an alliance very long," he said this uncomfortably, what could have made them seperate?

"...why not?"

"We just, you know, argued," it looked like that was all I was going to get from him, so naturally I pressed it.

"About?"

This made him even more uncomfortable; he thought for a second then said, "about strategies and stuff." It seemed like such a normal possible answer that I told my disapointment to shove off. It was stupid a very, very selfish of me to think that they would fight over me.

Flynn said that he wanted to relocate, he wanted to start right away finding the others in the alliance, but after I noticed the way he winced everytime he made the slightest ajustment we argued that it had to wait until he was a little more healed. In the end I won the argument by poking his wound unexpectantly and having him yelp in pain. Let's just say I knew how to win fights against him now.

Though winning the fight meant more than not looking for people, it meant having the constant fear of being found. I spent the first full of on guard duty, I told Flynn to rest up after our fight and he protested rather feebly then fell back fast asleep after eating. I sat outside our tent in a tree with my sword.

Only one interesting thing happened on guard duty- I made my second kill. It was really late at night- the death tolley had already faded by with no deaths today- and I could barely keep my eyes awake. Flynn was fast asleep in the tent, and my ears were taking over for my eyes in guard mode. I heard and rustling in the bushes too close to the tent, so with much hesitation I launched my sword start into the bushes, then jumped down from the tree.

I made my way steathly to the sword sticking straight out of the bush, yet quickly pulled the sword out of the bush. I smelt blood. And at the end of the sword was blood. My heart thumped in my ears and I thought that whoever it was hadn't made a sound in death- maybe they died pretty fast? I could have easily hit them in the heart. But no canons went off, so I prepared myself for battle with my sword at ready, and moved the bush.

I screamed at the top of my lungs, a thing I highly advise against in the arena, and it made Flynn come bolting it out of the tent. I dropped my sword and started shaking my hands quickly.

"What- what is it?" Flynn yelled at me. He grabbed my arms to get me to stop flalling them.

I just couldn't talk, "Iiiiijjuhhh kiiiillllllluheded!"

"Pauper! Slowly now!" it took him unearthing his knife for me to get a tiny grip on myself.

"I-I _killed_ it!"

"Killed what?" he tried to keep calm for the sake of trying to keep me calm but I saw the look of panic flash in his eyes.

"Badger!" I wailed.

Everything was silent for a second, then very slowly Flynn smiled, "are you serious?" he laughed.

I shoke my head, "not funny!"

But that just made him laugh louder.

After that Flynn said he was rested enough to take guard duty for his first time. I tried to object, but I guess I was pretty tired and just kind of wandered off to sleep in the tent. In the morning Flynn made badger, I refused to eat it, but frankly it smelled too good, and Flynn's talks of protein and going to waste seemed to convince me that the badger would have wanted it like this.

Two days passed by with nothing happening. No deaths marked in the sky at night, and therefore no fun for the viewers. I loved the feeling that everything was okay in the arena, but of course okay never lasted long in these games. Early morning of day three, I let out another high pitched scream that wasn't caused by killing an animal.


	21. Chapter 18: The Wall of Fire

Fire.

A wall of _fire _in the distance, coming straight twoards us. A red hot flaming fire. I could feel the heat radiating from so far away. Having the nickname 'fire dancer' back in district two seemed to mock me as I jumped down from the tree.

Flynn had woken up from the scream I let out when I saw it, and he was thankfully already out of the tent. There was no time to pack, I just grabbed the backpack that had whatever supplies still left in it; Flynn saw what was going on and yelled one strong word, 'run!'

He turned his back to the raging fire and grabbed my hand and pulled me into a run. Even at a sprint the fire was always at our ankles, attempting to have us stay in one position long enough to catch. We ran five minutes.. ten minutes.. fifteen.. this is too much for me, let alone Flynn, who dispite the knife wound was running even faster than me. My breathing came in huffs, and I just wanted to stop running, just die and burn.

I've always said that in the event that someone was about to kill me and asked, 'would you like to drown to death, or burn?' I had mentally picked out a watery grave. There was the five minutes of europia that came with it, and you don't _feel_ like the way you feel fire, it doesn't hurt as bad as fire does- you numb up. So running for a long time threw a forest I couldn't help but remind myself of that thought.

To my right I heard rustling, which made my already frantic heart beat even more profusley. Then came into the clearly hair that matched the thing it was running from- little Artemis, who is bolting it away from the fire. Electra is trailling two feet behind her, her entire right leg already black from something that looks to be the work of ice- the exsact oppisite.

I look quickly at Flynn, who's now looking away from me on his left, he moves for a fraction of a second, and I catch of glimpse of a blonde haired boy who is running for his life alongside me. And in that fraction of a glimpse, I lose control of myself, and fall.

Something eating off my leg, I groggily think, and groan as I try to kick it away. My eyes are closed, and I'm in my comfy bed in distrcit two, and it was all just a dream, the gnawing at my leg continues, "Calif, noooo," I mumbled, "if you keep doing that I won't make you breakfast!"

A laugh comes from my feet that doesn't match Calif's. My eyes fly open, and I'm alive.

"Wha-" I gasp, I remember how my dream that my reality was a dream and my dream was well- a dream. The laugh had come from Flynn, who's standing up looking down at me. The monster knawing off my leg is actually the one who's trying to bandage them, someone I didn't want to die without seeing, and the one who made me trip in the first place- Nowl Flight.

"Look," a small voice explains, and I move my head in the direction of the voice, which makes me lean my head back all the way while maintaing the laying position I'm in. The voice comes from Artemis, who's inspecting intently a wall. I'm in a tiny clearing in the forest, but what makes me blink and think that I'm seeing things is that the wall is made up of fire, the flames go as high as the sky, but no furthur- the don't follow us anymore, and I can bearly feel the heat from them.

"Trippy," I note.

"You tripped and I pulled you away from the fire, but I guess I wasn't quick enough..." Flynn said, noting my legs. It wasn't that bad of a burn, they were just bright bright red and burned like burns do. Nowl was dapping cold water onto them, which admittadly helped a lot. How did I get on this mattress? I was about to ask when Nowl anwsered my unspoken question.

"It was in the clearing- I guess this was someone's camp. The fire could have scared them away, or... well, who knows what else could have happened to them," we are all silent for a moment, and I continue to look around the tiny clearing we've all ended up at. With a whoosh of emotion- relief?- I note that the alliance is all back again. Nowl keeps applying water to my burned legs, Flynn goes threw the bag I managed to salavage of our camp, Artemis still stares up at the wall of fire, Electra beside her, and I lay on the mattress biting my teeth at the pain that keeps prickling my legs. But this alliance is now broken, fratured by the ilhumanity these games has bestoed onto us. I could easily picture Libera here, sitting quietly on the grass, and Char, helping Nowl with my legs.

The thought of Libera awakens my mind, and for an uncomfortable second I'm looking at Electra and we catch eyes. I figure I have to say something, "I'm so sorry about Libera,"

Electra gives me a rather dirty glare, "Libby," her voice sounded weak and broken, "she likes-d to be called Libby."

I nod my head- the best nod I can do while laying down- and try not to think of my neighbours dog whom was also named Libby.

There's a long silence, in which we all continue doing nothing productive until Flynn speaks up, and apparently he was doing productive things: "we need to find a house,"

"Why?" I ask.

"Too dangerous," sprouts Nowl.

"We just ran by one being burned down," Artemis frowns.

Electra is the only one who didn't protest, and Artemis gives her an uncertain glance, as though she's sure something's wrong with her.

"Think about it, we only have enough food in here to last a couple of days, Pauper needs a place to heel, and we have some of the best fighters on our team. We need to,"

I really do think about it, I think about how windows in the houses are bulletproof, so only the front and back doors will need guarding, and Flynn's right, they're the best- and so far the only place I've found that supplies food and water. But Nowl puts a damper on my thoughts by saying, "think about Char, Leek got into the house..."

I remember that Nowl and Flynn were the ones battlign Leek away from Char, "but I'm sure everything will be better now that I killed Leek, Thailia and them won't come looking for a fight, they're more... defensive." The way I say defensive leaves even me uncertain. Thailia's group seems more mysterious than anything, but the house seems like a too good to be true deal, and I can't help but thinking that if the shower's not full of poison, it'd be brillant to get clean.

"You killed Leek?" asked a tiny voice from Artemis. She's looking at me differently, is that frighten in her eyes?

"Well, he would have killed me," I rationialize, "and he _killed _Char," I add a little hysterically.

She just looks away, and I whimper because pain shots threw my legs again. I want to be the brave girl who gritts her teeth and takes pain well, but I'm not, and when Nowl stops dabbing cold water on my legs, my white blood cells panic and I whimper again.

"I'm sorry," he looks so hurt I don't doubt that he actually means it, "but we need to save some water," and it makes scene, so I nodd and close my eyes and hope the pain subsides soon. I try to tell myself that 'pain is but an element of the mind', an old quote my dad told me if I stubbed my toe, as it was true, but of course, it didn't help anything but in fact made me more angry at my father and my toe hurt even more because I'm focusing more on the pain.

"So, can we hurry and find a house, it might take all day?" Electra asks this only to me, and I realize that like before, I'm appointed leader of this alliance that I will not be alive long enough to see who wins.

We embark on a journey looking for a new home, all silent, and then it seems to dawn on everyone at the same time when we hear a cannon in the distance- only one can live in this alliance. Eventually we all have to kill each other. I limp along, supported by Nowl on one side and Flynn on the other, and realize that I may be the one who chooses the winner, as I could save anyone I wanted too, and destroy them too.


	22. Chapter 19: the Bird and the Bird Caller

**Alive: Pauper, Nowl, Flynn, Artemis, Electra, Thailia, Remus, Hannah, Vail, Favian. **

For someone who was trying to get themselves killed in these games I've lasted far too long. The house is oh so nicely equiped with a sun window to see who's in the sky at what I like to call the new dead time, so when the sky shone the one person who died today it all just hit me. Dell. The poor little Dell. His smiling face in the clouds, followed by the capitoal logo. How'd he die? Could it have been my life that saved him. I started to cry hysterically, everyone tried to calm me down. Flynn hugged me, but I didn't want to be hugged. I simply wanted to reverse time and stay with Dell, instead of handing him a kitchen knife and some food. I sobbed into Flynn, and felt Nowl's hand rubbing my back. Electra stayed staring up at the now black sky, and Artemis grabbed my hand and held it tightly.

I felt so stupid. I felt dirty, I shouldn't be alive still. I didn't come in here to outlive people.

My name's Pauper Dea Bukater, and I'm going to die in the Hunger Games.

I want to die in the Hunger Games. I just want to die.

We made it to the house hours ago and secured it. The house was the smallest I'd seen in the arena, everything was all in one small cramped room, then there was a bathroom. It looked like a cheap motel room, and smelt kind of like one too, with it's puke green patterened colored bed spreads and two paintings on the wall of a little girl in a flower patch, and a little boy walking down a street. For a weird reason this place gave me the creeps, but for once I felt comforted. With all of us guarding no one can hurt us- hopefully.

There was two double beds, and sat and hugged my knees to my chest to comfort myself. The tears hadn't stopped, and it felt like they never would until the well ran dry. I was all too aware of being on camera for the world to see, and for the first time I hated it. I wanted to just be alone, but alone was no longer an option when I had all my alliance- my friends- who I needed to protect.

"You should probably go to sleep- I'll take watch," Flynn offered, but I shook my head. Sure, I am tired, but Flynn keeping watch while his stab wound was still healing didn't float my boat. He looked paler than usual, and he had done a lot today- running from the wall of fire, and the hour walk it took to find the house, which both must have killed him, dispite what he's letting on.

"I don't think I can sleep," I stood up, and as I did my tears ran dry, "I'll take first watch after I get cleaned up, everyone rest up." I walked to the bathroom and looked in the mirror. I found it cruel and unsual that they even put a mirror inside the hunger games, seeing as there was little time for maintence while you're trying to save you're own life, and kill everyone else. My face was brown with dirt, and my hair was knotted and full of leaves and twigs, making me almost unreconizable, the only thing that reminded myself of my prior beauty was my brown eyes, which were red from crying.

_Am I pretty now Calif? Do you still love me looking like this? _That thought made me not want to get cleaned up, but the showered called to me, begging me to enter.

I took a fairly quick shower and had to fight myself to get out. It was like heaven. After all those days of letting dirt and grease build on me, it was such a relief to soap it all off. My burns on my legs sighed contently when I put cold water on them, and when I removed the steam from the mirror I smiled to myself. I am a lot more than just pretty, but I also am pretty. I bite my lip at my arrogance, and quickly got dressed in sadly my dirty black tank top and dirty cargo pants. I brushed my teeth and hair, and went to go take guard.

Artemis and Flynn were already fast asleep, each on their own seperate beds. Electra was sitting up beside Artemis, hugging her pillow and wishing it could hug her back. She just stared at the wall blankly, which made me sad. Nowl was no where to be seen, so naturally when I made my way outside to guard the house, I slipped on the last step because he scared me.

"Bird," he giggled, and helped me up, and without warning he pulled me into a hug. This hug wasn't like the one Flynn had given me earlier, this one I wanted. And I hugged back so hard that I never ever wanted to let go, "why did you leave me?"

I pulled out of the hug, knowing exsactly what he meant. We had made the perfect alliance, and me and Nowl Flight had even spent nights back in the capitol planning what to do. Our nights spent together ended so quickly after we kissed that it didn't make much sense for me to miss him, but I did. I spent every second away from Nowl in the game wanting to be by his side protecting him.

"I had too," I whispered, and it was true. I'm still a very, very big target, despite the fact that my perfect score came from me flashing the gamemakers.

He sighed, "you could have told me- it could have been just the two of us. I wouldn't have minded being a target with you..." he tralled off and the look he gave me made my heart flutter.

"Nowl," I breathed. I wanted to tell him how every night I prayed for him not to be in the sky, how I wanted to use my life to save him and let me die, and how- how I stranglely enough loved him, but all that came out was, "coulda, woulda, shoulda, didn't," and a little laugh. This was the Hunger Games, and there was never a happy ending in the Hunger Games. Love doesn't exist inside this arena.

Nowl opened his mouth to say something, but then all too suddenly he grabbed my waist and threw me behind him. He held up his knife in front of him, and I unshed my sword and glared in the same direction that he was looking- to the right in the woods.

There was a long and silent pause, I peered over Nowl's broad shoulder to see nothing, but then a form appeared limping away in the distance. The closer it came I realized that with it's bring blue hair and head titled to the side, that this girl was not limping, but skipping merrily threw the arena at night. Vail, the girl from district four.

Nowl took a step twoards her defensively, she had made it to the end of the clearing inwhich the house was located in, then she stopped skipping.

"Hello hello," she smiled brightly, "it's the bird and the bird caller, the two from two, the pauper and pauper," she sang.

I sidestepped so that I was beside Nowl as she began humming, we gave each other a look that asked if she was serious, but at the same time we had smiles playing on our lips. This was a joke, right?

"Hi Vail," I said, realizing that we'd been not so discreet about our looks, "how are you?" -it was all I could think of to say.

"I'm swell," she sang, "clean as a whistle, happy as a whistle, and merry as a whistle,"

"That's- good," Nowl chimed in. I could hear the laughter being controlled in his voice, which made me want to lose it.

"I'm glad glad glad that you two are alive," she said, suddenly uber serious, "she talks a lot of murdering you, Pauper."

Her words sent a shiver down my back, even though it was a fairly warm night- probably because the fire, "who talks?"

"Thailia, Thailia, Thailia, brown hair, brown eyes, about this tall," she stood on her tipytoes to show Thailia's height. It wasn't that Thailia was overly tall, Vail was just a shorter one in the games.

I grimaced, Thailia was the one me and Nowl kissed to get rid of that one night that seemed too long ago, why should she talk about wanting to murder me, but more importantly, "how do you know this Vail?"

"Oh, I hear everything, nobody cares to talk quietly anymore," she giggled, "I know you ate badger, and you saved Dell's life a lot more than you even know know know!"

"Dell?" I put my hand to my heart, "how?"

"He died from the fire, he lived because of you! He met up with Hannah and lived in a fight, and he didn't strave," she sighed, "if only you could have made him run faster..."

"How do you know everything that happens in here, Vail?" I said slowly, for she was starting to creep me out.

She brought her voice down to an almost inaudible whisper, "I can't tell you, but I can show you,"

There was something that I liked about Vail. Part of me thought that she was creepy, her knowledge and the way she talked gave me shivers, but her innocence at happy vibes made me want to be around her all the time. For the first time in the arena, I wasn't stressing, her voice calmed me. I trust her, which is something I could say for no one else in these games. Not even Nowl.

"Lead the way," I encouraged, and Vail turned to face the woods when I heard it.

A creek on the step sent my head whipping back twoards the house, where there was a dark silouette with a bow and arrow, he let the arrow fly, right into Vail's back. She let out a tiny "oh!" and fell forwards."

"Vail!" I screamed, and ran twoards her, Nowl ran beside me and moved her so that she was laying down, facing the sky.

She had a dreamy look on her face, but her eyebrows were furrowed in pain and there was so much blood so quick.

"Pauper," she managed to say, her voice sounding horrible, "I'm dying..."

My voice broke, I'm surprised I could talk, "it's going to be okay," I lied, there was nothing I could do, I fixed her hair, and cried.

"You're my best friend," she closed her eyes, and I closed mine. The cannon went off, too loud. I hugged my best friend.

I opened my eyes to see Nowl, but Nowl wasn't across Vail's body anymore, I whipped my head around and saw that he had made it to the porch, where the archer I had completly forgotten about stood there, frozen.

Someone opened the window inside the house to see what all the noise was about- which gave the porch just enough light for me to see Nowl punch Flynn square in the face.


	23. Chapter 20: Vail's Tale

Flynn spit blood which had dripped from his now broken nose to his mouth. Nowl walked down off the porch and started pacing next to Vail's body, never looking down at her corspe, and shaking his hand to try and get the pain to leave. Artemis had barred the door, I assume she figured that a battle would soon befall us and that her and Electra should be kept safe out of it. That or we wouldn't want to stain the carpets inside.

I, on the other hand, was freaking out. I was still hugging Vail. I only _really _met this all-knowing weird blue haired girl two minutes before her death, a death caused by my boyfriend. I hugged her limp body so tightly. I tried to imagine her life if she had family, friends, or pets watching the television at home and wishing they could hug her as hard as me, it made it so much sadder but yet so much better to think that she had people who loved her back in district four, even if it means that their sad.

**...**

_The Life of Vail Hedowl_

St. Brus' Insitiute for Mental Cases and Extremely Incrueable Oddities

Reaping Day for the Forty-First Hunger Games

Everything was gray in this room. Gray walls, gray chairs, the wood table even seemed to be graying, and not to mention the uniforms included a gray kilt and gray cardigan. The only color that popped was the color of the fourteen year-old female who was seated along the table, who had hair of startling aqua blue. She was humming loudly, and bearly touching her gray poridge, which everyone else at the table was shoving into their faces with such enthosiasm it made it seem as though they haven't aten in days, which of course, most haven't.

Her pale complexion and awkward posture set her apart even more from the other people seated at this table, but her appearence was the only thing that did. She was the youngest at the table of thirty- maybe forty- people, most of whom looked well over the age of twenty. Her expression was content, happy at the day, and her smile a huge contrast to the dull and dank impression that te room gave, and the thirty- maybe forty- frowns that filled the rest of the seats.

A lone seat beside this very different girl was empty, and every few seconds this girl would let her eyes wander to the seat, only to catch herself and look away quickly.

Another stroke of color came into the room, another blue head, only much taller than the girl, and the hair belonged to a boy around the same age. His expression was a smirk, a confident and gloating one. He sat in the chair next too the little girl, and didn't touch his porriage either.

"I love you," he said simply.

She immediatly stopped humming, and her eyes grew three times the usual size, "excuse me?" she asked, bewildered.

"When they, when they set you free just know that I love you," he said again, even more simply.

"What has gotten into you, Christopher?" she giggled.

"The boy with the blue hair, the girl with the blue hair," Christopher sang, "mad in love, and mad in the head,"

They were oblivious to the thirty- maybe forty- eavesdroppers that were sitting around the table. One had taken the girl's porrige, and one was slyly attempting to taken the boy's.

"I'm going to paradise, aren't I?" she said grimly, randomly serious, "you couldn't... resheduale the appointment."

He become serious too, "I tried, I tried so hard Vail- us dying our hair blue didn't help. They assume we're both more mad now than ever! We are mental cases, and you know what they do to extemely incrueable oddities."

A voice from across the room spoke up, one unnoticed previously by all the uniformed thirty- maybe forty- people. A stern woman, with a high pony tale and and a mean looking face had a deep harsh accent as she spoke, "we cure them,"

Vail and Christopher looked slowly to her, and Vail screamed loudly at her, "I don't need curing!"

The woman answered calmly, which I'm sure you know that when you're yelling at someone is the exsact oppisite that will calm you down, "you'll love it in paradise, you'll be able to happily lose your mind and never have to worry about anything again."

"No!" She screamed louder, "I refuse! You can take me away from my home and my friends, my family, and everything else but you can't take me away from my mind! I don't want freedom, I'd rather be caged!"

"Everybody loves freedom, Vail" she smiled, "right Jerome? Scarlett? Margerer?" She gestured to three people sitting at the table. They were there, eating their porrige, sitting at the table, but they weren't there. Their eyes glazed over and their faces were in content. They were given lobotomys. Just like Vail will be, later today.

"I'd much rather die!" 

A dark silence filled the room. Christopher furrowed his blue eyebrows, and ran his fingers threw his hair, the stern lady smile faltered, then appeared again even more mailcious.

But she simplily marched out of the gray room.

Vail huffed and closed her eyes that matched her head. The thirty- or forty people all stood at the sound of a bell and began dragging their feet out of the dining hall, but Christopher and Vail stayed behind.

"Is it true, true, true that you love me?" She blushed.

"Always have," he smiled, "since the first day you arrived,"

And the blue haired people smiled at each other, but the smile broke quickly on the girl's face, "I'm not getting a lobotomy today, Christopher."

He stared at her for a very long time, and then closed his eyes, "you can't..."

"I would rather die than not live,"

He paused again, "you're going to volunteer?"

She nods.

An hour before the reaping begins our blue haired friends are sitting on the top bunk of a bunk bed shared with the same gray thirty- or forty give or take, people. They hold hands, and don't speak. Saying goodbye is inebitable, but the wait is prolonged by the two. Finally, unable to stand the silence, or because his vocal chords were icthing the boy left out a big huff.

Vail spared a puzzled glance at the boy, and he jumped from the top bunk and motioned her to follow him. And she did, of course. Down a hallway to the left, now the right, a second right. Down a flight of tall stairs, and another. Through a few trap doors, and hidden exits. The whole building was gray and smelled of rust from water on metal, but the patients at the insitiute ethier got used to it, or didn't have the mind to care.

Finally they reached a room with many what seemed to be off television screens, and a big control panel under them. "Survelliance room?" the girl guessed, "pourquoi?"

"Not all who are mad are stupid, I managed to er er er, tap into the gamemakers computers."

"I don't understand," she whispers.

"Your token can have a communication device hidden in it. Hidden reallllly really well, but still work the same. You can win this, Vail. Nobody knows about this room, I can sneak down here and tell you what to do, how to win..."

"We have less than an hour to do make a hidden token, Christopher," Vail shakes her head.

But Christopher had this planned, for a fortnight ago he had heard the owner of St. Brus' Insitiute for Mental Cases and Extremely Incrueable Oddities, the same woman we saw earlier, talk to Scarlett about another lobotomized vegetable who will join her, but it would be kept a secret, not like Vail's procedure would be. His brain would turn to mush, and so Christopher had planned, and planned. He would volunteer and Vail would be on the other side of the communication. He handed Vail a trident necklace, already made, with the hidden communications device. He kept this a secret, but a week later Christopher overheard another conversation. Vail would be lobotomized alongside Christopher for dying her hair blue alongside him. Therefore now, Vail would volunteer, and Christopher would be on the other side of the communication device, waiting his lobotomy. He can't volunteer, because only one of them could come back, and given the communication device, one of them needed to stay behind.

There only hope would be to win, and escape to victors village. And so less than an hour later, Vail walked up to the stage, and smiled and waved with her dreamy expression and uttered the words, "I volunteer, bro."

Christopher's shoulders slumped, wishing he could at the very least be in Pauper's shoes, hugged Vail's lifeless body, wanting nothing more than to be dead alongside her. The door behind him opened, a team of peacekeepers that work in the insitiute armed with guns grabbed Christopher and dragged him away.

I let go of Vail, knowing that all too soon a hovercraft would come and take her away, but I didn't want to go to the porch. Flynn was still there, standing in shock, and alive. It didn't seem fair, but with the Hunger Games, is anything ever fair?

I started to pace alongside Nowl until too much anger fueled inside me, my body started shaking uncontrolibly, and I knew that I looked weak for the cameras but didn't care.

Instead, I ran up to the porch and punched Flynn in the already broken nose, hoping and knowing from his grunt how much it hurt. Good, I think.


	24. Author's Note and apology!

Author's note: I am a thousand times sorry that writing that last chapter took so long! My computer crashed and I bought a new one, but I had the chapter saved on the crashed one, and so it was finally fixed, and I transfered the files over. SORRY.

PS. team Nowl, the bird caller cutie from district two, or the badasss Flynn from district twelve who loves defying the capitol? Lemme know who you're all for!


	25. Chapter 21: A Gun Verses a Sword

**I am BEYOND sorry for the lack of updates. I guess you can blame it on having a guy in my life, or having a job for a bit, and school, but honestly I don't know why this chapter took me so long to write. I promise the next one will follow close behinf this one, and will be full of action. 3**

**Alive: Pauper, Nowl, Flynn, Artemis, Electra, Thailia, Remus, Hannah, Favian. **

Flynn left later the next morning. I can't say that I'm sorry he did. No one from our alliance seemed to have it in it to kill him, even me. We probably all looked so weak for the audience but after so long in the arena a lot of us have just stopped caring.

Once Flynn had been gone for a while Artemis unlocked the doors, and we then had an early breakfast of granola bars and beef jerky. No one wanted to go back to sleep. Electra spent all of this time just staring out the window, and so when she stood up all the muscles in my body tensed defensively.

She didn't reach for a pack or anything, but instead the door handle, "where are you going?" Artemis questioned in a mock light voice.

Electra stopped, look everyone of us in the eyes, then said, "to see Libby."

It was so awkward. I mean, it was obvious that Electra had gone mad, not to the level Vail was, but something snapped, which after being in the Hunger Games most people did, but she had seen Libby die. It was either she was saying she'd go to see whom she still thought was living, or she was going to kill herself. I didn't want to ask.

And apparently no one else did. Artemis got off the bed and hugged Electra's waist, then Electra simply left.

"This way we won't have too," Artemis said sadly, "kill her, I mean. I didn't want to have to do it, but she looked like she'd snap on us any second..."

"It's okay, Artemis, even if we tried to stop her she wouldn't let us," Nowl stated grimly. I nodded in agreement.

By late afternoon we decided that there's no use in staying in this house. Two of our now possible enemies, Flynn and Electra knew it's location, and we now lack the defenses we had when our alliance had been whole. The 'career' alliance had the same amount as us, Thailia, Remus, and Favian. We repacked our packs, refilled our water canteens, and set off again in the woods.

We made it about five miles when we heard a cannon. My legs locked, and I met eyes with Nowl, who's expression matched mine. Who could it have been this time?

"We have to keep moving," Artemis said, eyes watering a bit, and we started up again. There was something about Artemis that I respected more than I respected anyone. She was a lot more skilled than most of the tributes, not physically, but mentally she had a good brain. Logical, exspecially for her age. I didn't want her to die.

Part of me knew that I was getting too far in this game. We're down to nine out of twentyfour tributes, and that number is only decreasing. I should have saved someone's life with my own by now. I should be dead.

It was a beautiful sunset by the time we made it to a rock cave on top of a hill that fit two bodies comfortably, but the three of us fit tightly. The scenery looked so peaceful it mocked us. The orange color of the sky, and way the sun kissed the top of the trees. It was almost erry.

I was stupid to take first watch.

It fell dark real quick after soon arriving. Artemis and Nowl feel asleep fast, a long day of walking clearly exhausted them. I was feeling tired too, but my mind wouldn't let me think of anything other than last night.

I tried to see it in Flynn's shoes; he was a nice guy afterall. I furrowed my brows and realized something new, he was obsessed with getting back at the Capitol, why? I don't understand why I didn't pick up on it sooner, he made it obivous: his interview was a big smack in the face for the gamemakers. Our whole relationship was forbidden in here. What made him so harsh to the Capitol?

The Hunger Games should be the obivous answer, and even I know that life in district twleve where he's from is ten times poorer than the poorest part of district two. But there's something more.

I'm trying to stay mad at him for murdering Vail, but I closed my eyes and sighed, but this is the Hunger Games. Murdering someone, no matter how innocent, is nessassry.

_Thump, thump, thump. Footsteps! _How long do I have before they reach me? My mind went into panic mode, blocking out any normal thought. _I have to get them away from the cave_, finally a logical thought passed my mind, and I started walking heavily to the left of the cave.

They footsteps stopped, then speed up in my direction. I made it as far as a rocky clearing, then I shed my sword from my belt and planted my boots firmly on the ground. The Capitol audience, and the rest of Panem would be in for a show tonight.

The footsteps belonged to a girl, and I tensed, figuring it was Thailia, who was probably leading her career alliance on an ambush.

But then the figured of the girl stepped out into clear view. It was Electra. I smiled at her, which she didn't return. Stupidly, I put down my sword, and went over to talk to her.

I guess I wanted to help her out. She looked at me with insane eyes. Her short pixie hair was in a mess. She was covered in mud. Electra screamed loudly in the night air, and held out her arm. I didn't check her hand before, and in it was something only peacekeepers possesed. A gun. It was tiny, but it would still do the job.

"Electra..." I started, she just screamed again, piercing the night air. Then she loaded the gun, and held her finger on the trigger.

I stood motionless. I wasn't trainned in this combat. I could sword fight, I could even win against an archerer while they were reloading their bow, but I could _not _tackle a bullet.

I closed my eyes to prepare for death. I wouldn't die saving someone, I would never get that chance. I couldn't tell Nowl that I loved him. I couldn't tell Flynn that I'm sorry for punching him in the nose. I knew Calif and my mother were eagerly watching the television, smiling at this moment, and sqirming in the anticipation of it. The trigger went off.

But I wasn't hurt. _Ow, fuck!_ Scrath that. I was. I was shot, but only a flesh wound, which means that the bullet just skimmed the side of my left arm. I opened my eyes, how could she have missed such an easy target?

Oh. That's why. Because someone had beheaded her before she could. I blinked. There stood Favian, the black hair violet eyed tribute from district four, wish a long sword in his hands. Shock on his face at what he just did.

Then blood poored from his mouth and he collasped beside the two pieces of Electra.

Thailia stood behind the pile of body, smiling, with a blow gun to her lips, taking a nice deep breath.


	26. Chapter 22: Broken Spine and Two Kisses

**Alive: Pauper, Nowl, Flynn? Artemis, Thailia, Hannah [district 1 girl]? Remus? (one of the question marks are dead, who?)**

My life had flashed in my eyes when Electra had the gun at me. And now, with Thailia here, about to let go of her breath inside her blow gun, I wasn't in the mood to watch my stupid, boring, predictable, planned life over again.

I dropped to the ground, ungracefully, and my limbs spread out like an open umbrella around me. Thankfully, this confused Thailia, she let go of her huff of breath, the the dart inside the blow gun flew past my head and got stuck on one of the only trees in this rock filled clearing. I ducked under a huge nearby rock, and picked up my sword that I had dropped when Electra had first come into the clearing.

It was now or never to get Electra by a bit of surprise.

I guess she was thinking the same thing, because at the same time she jumped twoards where she knew I would come out from behind the rock, and I jumped right into her.

We dropped our weapons at the same time in this collision.

If we weren't obvious enemies trying to kill each other, it would have almost been funny. The thing is, Thailia is huge and muscular and probably hadn't lived a priveleged life in two, therefore she overpowered me easily and landed on top of me.

I tried to push her up, but she quickly moved her knees to be sitting on my arms. I bucked and shook out from under her, but nothing could move her.

The sad part was that the only thing I remember thinking was that she's kind of pretty, and maybe we'd actually get along if we weren't in the Hunger Games. She had been the one to see me and Nowl kissing, but she never really told anyone. The thought of Nowl brought me back to reality.

"Get off!" I huffed.

"Oh, what's that? You want me to get off and let you kill me, yes of couse, allow me," her voice was full of sarcasm.

I tried bucking again but it was no use. My arm still hurt from the bullet, and I was weak. There, I'm weak. At least my life saved someone in district two. It was nice to think that. I still will fight though, I might as well go out with a bang.

Surprising both her and myself, I kissed her.

Thailia's face went into sheer confusion. I wanted to laugh at it. But instead survival clued it. I then went from a kiss to a bit, right in her neck.

I felt like a wolf, or a dog biting into the neck of a bear. I felt blood in my mouth and gagged.

Then came another surprise, which this day was full of, someone pulled Thailia's hair back, which made her neck blood poor onto me. I must have punctered something important for that much blood.

I felt the weight of another body add onto me on top of Thailia, someone who was helping me. I pushed against the now occupied Thailia, who was dealing with her neck and was fighting whoever was on top of her, and rolled from underneath them.

At this time I realized that I had been so inlove with the beauty of the night sky, that I forgot to look in the sky to see who's face would have been in it! I had been so stupid! It was probably Remus now, pulling off Thailia to kill me himself.

I checked to confirm my suppisions but instead found out I was wrong. It was so dark out I barely made out the figure of little Artemis, who was on top of Thailia's back, punching her head. Had she been able to wonder off without waking Nowl?

I picked up my sword, ready to stab at Thailia, but there wasn't an opening. Then a hand clasped onto my raised sword arm.

The scary thing was, I had never heard this voice before. It was a girl's, and she spoke so soft, "you stab now and little district twelve will get hurt, there's nothing you can do,"

I pried my eyes away from the jumped of Thailia and Artemis to look at my words of wisdom.

"You're from district one," was all I thought to say.

"Yes, and you from two," she remarked. She had long blonde hair, whiter than mine. Her eyes still had the makeup she had on when she came into these games. She was a tiny bit shorter than me, obviously younger. She didn't look anything like the sterotypical glammour goddess from district one, and reminded myself of me.

A scream made me whip my head away from the possible treat of the district one girl, and I saw that Thailia had won her fight. The small figure fo Artemis was broken. Her spine snapped. I forgot how to breath.

The girl from district one let go of my arm, and I toke up my sword. Yet Thailia didn't fight back, she looked down at Artemis, then over to me. Her eyes were dropping, and there was so much blood on her from her neck, and other wounds that Artemis had made during their battle.

She dropped dead before I had the chance to kill her. Then the cannons came. _Bom, bom, bom, bom._ Then silence. So many dead in such short time. Electra, who was once happily laughing in a cow suit next to a tall and gangly Libby who had died at the corruncopia, then Favian, who taught me how to laugh from tickling me so hard. Then Artemis, the smartest and bravest girl I ever met, now broken, then Thailia, who was just another girl thrown into the mess of the Hunger Games.

I turned back to face the district one girl, but she was gone. She had left so quietly fear gripped my heart. I looked around me and even though it was so dark, I saw figures of the dead in the moon light.

My feet started running before I told them too, back to the cave. My breath was rapid and wouldn't slow down. I sprinted faster than I thought possible. I wanted my dad there, but he had abandoned years ago. I wanted him to comfort me like he used to before he left. Was he watching me right now? Yelling at me to be careful.

"Artemis? _Pauper_?" It was Nowl! His voice echoed. He must have finally woken after hearing the cannons, he was thinking the worst, obviously. Who wouldn't me.

"Nowl! Nowl I'm here!" I called, not caring who heard me. Only district one girl and Flynn where in this arena other than us. We were out of harm's way.

For the second time tonight, I crashed into someone. But this one was welcome. I fell flat on my butt then pushed myself back up and wrapped my arms around Nowl. My breathing was still rapid, my heart racing, but I was okay. He hugged me tightly, "I thought you died,"

"This is the Hunger Games, Nowl, we're so stupid for having these feelings in here, but I love you and I never want you to die! I'm in love with you," I laugh breathily. Well, that's it, I've gone insane.

"Pauper, I know we're stupid, I love you too!" I could hear him smiling, "from the moment I layed eyes on you when you volunteered! I love you, bird." He hugged me tighter.

"We're probably both going to die," I laughed, "but this silly moment makes it worth it!"

And he held me at arms length, holding my shoulders. I realized that I was crying, and he just stared into my eyes. Then he kissed me. So passionatly. He put his arms around my back and pulled me closer, and my hands found their way to his hair and I kissed back.

And then a cannon went off, and the moment of perfection was gone. I let go of him, and he me, and we looked sadly at each other, knowing that we'll have to die. That I'll have too, because I'm not letting this boy who does birdcalls and loves me die. Nowl will be the victor.

And as dawn hit the horizon I realized that I'm in the final three. Me, Now, and one other. Either Flynn or distrist one girl.


	27. Chapter 23: The Girls with Black Eyes

We camped out in the cave we had found earlier, this time asleep in each other's arms. Once we had made it back to the cave after realizing that we were in the final three, we did stuff that people in love do, stuff that you shouldn't do while being on tv brocasted to all of Panem. But the kind of stuff that not only gives a big middle finger to the Capitol, but makes the last night alive worth it.

To be blunt, we had sex.

We awoke to the birds singing their lovely bird song. I wish I could describe it to you, as the last song I'll probably ever hear it hit every beautiful note too well. I wanted to trap Nowl in the cave and go out there and kill myself and whoever's left, but that would involve me telling Nowl my plan to kill myself and save him, and I'm sure that would go over well.

We had a feast breakfast, finishing almost everything there was, then Nowl banaged up my cuts from the fight before.

"How did Artemis die?" he asked in a would-be casual voice; I had forgotten that I never even tho him what happened last night. So I filled him in as best as I could without making it sound too brutal and bloodbathy as it was. I'm maybe the only one alive from that battle, if Hannah hadn't been the cannon we heard.

For all I know, Flynn and Hannah had had a ferocious battle that ended with one of them dead, and the other dying. I wish. Then I wouldn't have to kill anyone else other than myself.

We made our way out of the cave then just stood there. What now? We had no clue where the last tribute is. There's no way to figure that out either. What could I do, scream until they come after us? Not if they know that we're together. No one's that stupid.

So of course this is where the gamemakers come in. All of Panem is watching this eagerly- the final three, how more exciting can it get?- but nothing's happening. There's two tributes standing together and one wandering lost. Boring.

I guess it's time to say goodbye. We stand facing each other, wishing for words but nothing comes. How can you tell someone you love them when you're going to die later that day? Thankfully, Nowl has a way with words that I've always lacked.

"To die by your side is the best way for us now, it'll give us a little peace," I smile at this, to die by his side? That would be a dream. But not like this. When we're nearing a hundred years old and wrinkled, then dying by his side would be the dream. I smile harder and a tear falls from me, knowing that this is impossible. He holds out his hand and places it over my heart.

"It didn't have a reason to beat until it met you," and I'm surprised by my own romantic words and how obsoultely true they are. With Calif nothing close to love was felt. The oppisite, but now here I am, which nothing else to live for but for the boy who I need to die to see him live.

He then let out a bird call, one which a mockingjay picked up and more and more followed. Then it was beautiful, playing harmiously around us and I pulled on his collar then kissed him again. I never wanted it to end.

But all things come to an end.

And to murder the boredem of the viewers comes the last obsticle of the game: a mutation. I see her first hidden behind a tree. Then she walks out too graceful to be human. My first feelings are to help her. She's a little girl, too young to be in this arena where horrible things happen. But then I notice her eyes. Jet black, all of it. The white part, the pupil, and the part that's brown on me. They're like tar pits. I looked up at Nowl, who has offered his hand to her.

Then she screams. Not a little girl scream, but like a banshee. Loud, piercing, and almost deadly. It makes my mind stop. My limbs go numb. Nowl can't move his offered hand away from her, and I can bearly move a muscle.

We hear another scream in the distant, then another and another. Little girls with black eyes losing their lungs with a voice this loud. The border of the arena is surronded.

Suddenly they all stop at once. I must have been fighting hard to move, because once I can move again I fall, Nowl helps me up, and in this two seconds the tiny innocent looking girl grows claws that look like razor blades.

"Nowl, run!" I scream, and pull him. We head off in the other direction than the girl, and thankfully her tiny legs can't keep up. We keep running and running down hill until Nowl's foot catches, and since we're holding hands I fall with him. And when I look up there's a black hair, black eyed little girl that cocks her head to the side and screams again.

The chours of screams follow her, and again I find myself bearly able to move an inch. I fight it, little by little, then move my arms enough to grab a rock. I throw as hard as possible and the rock lodges in her tiny throat. She choakes and dies. Again the silence happens so abrutly it's creeping me out. I'm trying not to panick, to keep calm but it's hard.

Nowl helps me up. I look to where the little girl is lying dead, but she explodes! In water, too much water to have been in her tiny body. I look at Nowl but he's looking around us. We're in the bottom of a valley, the last place someone would want to be if there was a flood. And so of course, that's what there is.

The girls' must have all exploded at once, and so wave upon wave crash down around us. In seconds I'm soaked. My hand lose Nowl's and I scream his name. The water's freezing, like daggers piercing my skin. I want to wake up from this nightmare but I can't- I can't and I just want to find Nowl and save him!

My head is pushed underwater. I figure that if it had been a district four girl instead of me here, she'd surely be crowned victor. I can swim, but not too well. I kick my legs but I have no clue if I'm kicking up or down deeper into my watery grave. I stop kicking. I want to save Nowl but it's useless, I might as well die now instead of accidently out living him.

When I decided to breath in the ice cold water a hand grabs the back of my shirt and lifts me up. I come up gasping and panting and coughing and am ready to kiss Nowl for saving me, but it's not Nowl, it's Flynn. And he lays me down on what feels like shingles and starts pumping my heart, giving me CPR. I want to tell him to stop but I can't talk anymore because there's water in my lungs!

Then I cough it up, more like throw it up. I put my hand to my throat and breath sweet life. Too bad my life has to end so soon. But then Flynn does the silliest thing, he kisses me.

And I want to push him away but I know that I'm too weak, so I let him, then he says to me words that I'll never forget for as long as I live- which won't be very long, "live your life, find love, be reckless, and rebellious, live for all of us whose died in here, okay Pauper? I know that your plan was to die but that's not going to happen! So live, and show the Capitol that we didn't die in vain."

And then he jumps off our float shelter which I now realize is a roof and he actually goes back into the icy water! Why would he do that? I don't want to live, not with all these people who I care about dead. The only people I've ever cared about have died, this isn't fair to be the one who lives while everyone else makes it back home.

And now a blonde head submerges from the still raging loud water too far away from me, and I scream for Nowl, but he can't hear me. I do the only thing that makes sense and jump in to save him.

This time I keep my head above the water, and with all my might ignore the numbness my body feels in this cold. I pump my arms and kick my legs and make it to him! He's so colder- colder than me even, and I kiss him again in this freezing water. He kissed back then stops. In fact, he stops kicking all together. And now warmth fills my eyes but it's not the right time to cry because I need to see. I grab him before he can slip down into the water that's so deep and swim with him to the rooftop where Flynn brought me when he saved me.

And I pushed him onto the roof, wishing he was lighter but finding new strength in me. He couldn't die! He needs to win, not me!

And then I do CPR, which I don't really know how but have seen on television. I pump and breath air into him but it's not working. And I can't hear anything! The waves are so loud, then I hear something I cannot miss.

"Congratualations Pauper Dea Bukater, you have just won the fourty-first annual Hunger Games!"


	28. Chapter 24: Nowl Flight

I don't let go of Nowl's body. I graspe so tightly to him and try to give him heat because he's so cold. I freeze as they airlift me and Nowl's cold body onto the hovercraft.

There are so many people in there, helping me, well trying too, but I'm screaming. "No, no, no, NO!" None of this makes sense, why are they pulling me off him? Just let me stay here and cry and hug him at least, but they keep tugging and then I'm screaming for Nowl to help me but he's not moving and then I stop.

I go limp. Numb. Broken. He's dead. He's dead and I'm alive and he's dead. This wasn't suppose to happen like this. The people finally manage to pull me off of Nowl and they lay me on a medical bed. I can't move or talk, I'm in shock. I had come in here to die, and now I had to go back and live with Calif and my mother. Back to my planned future in district two. I didn't want this.

My eyes wander to Nowl, who lay still as a staute on the flood. He's wet, and I guess so am I but I don't care. I'm frozen, and they give me a blanket but I just stay laying down on the medical bed with my head to the side staring at Nowl's dead body. Tears try to warm me up, but I just feel hollow.

I see a trick of my eyes. His blue eyes open but that cannot be. He's dead. Then he gasps for air. The people who had had their eyes on me now all looked wide eyed around eachother.

I jump off the medical bed before anyone can stop me and hug Nowl, "you're alive!" I cry, and he has a weak smile now. I hug him tighter and he cough and I apologize and laugh breathlessly.

"His heart stopped..." a very obvious medical assisstant who was standing over us stated.

A man, who I assume was the head doctor aboard this hovercraft blinks, then runs his fingers threw his hair, "I don't understand..."

But finally a woman medical assisstant asked the question that I wanted to know, "so what now?"

So what now? The cameras are off and the dead has risen. They can't just kill him again, can they? I think of how it's six of them and two of us and how easy it would be to kill him and just have me as victor. The doctor clearly has this idea too, but he looks pained, which is funny because he's the doctor for the Hunger Games, how many deaths has he seen before?

"Call Labvious Hallwe," the doctor sighs. I know this name, it's the head gamemarker, the one I flashed in trainning. The one that had the final say to give me a twelve score.

The woman walked over to a phone hanging on the side of the wall of the hovercraft and I stared daggers at her. They were not going to take my Nowl away from me now. Not for a second time. Not after he had just had a miracle.

"Mr. Hallwe, hello, yes... yes a very dramatic ending... well you see I'm calling because-... no no she's alive... the problem is so is he..."

I heard a long pause on the other end of a phone, then a loud yell.

"Okay... thank you, sir," and with that she walks to a table full of medical instruments and prepares a needle.

"What'd he say?" It's me who asks, not the doctor or another medical assisstant. No, they're all in shock. You'd think I'd be too but I'm too happy and untrusting of everyone now that I'm not.

"He wants me to kill him," she says shaking.

"Well, I'm sorry, but I can't let you do that," Nowl is still laying on the floor, I wrap the blanket they had placed around me around him and then stand up. He looks so sick and scared that I don't want to let go of my hug but I have to. I position myself to protect him.

"I have to, Pauper..." she looks so sad, like she doesn't want to but knows that it's her head if she doesn't.

"Call Hallwe back, and let me talk to him," I demand in a calm voice. Everyone looks around, wondering if it's okay to take orders from this dripping wet girl who they all saw kill a boy on television. I try to smile.

The girl walks over to the phone on the wall, then realizes that no, I won't walk over there and leave Nowl incase someone pulls something. She instead puts the phone on speaker phone, something my dad always did when he was neeeded on business but still wanted to play with me.

She dials the numbers then shortly after I hear Hallwe's Capitol accent over the phone, "did you kill him yet?" is the first thing he says.

"I'm afraid that he won't be killed anytime soon," I smile, knowing that if I fight there will be truth in my words.

"Victor?" he asks, I say yes then he continues, "and what makes you think that we can't kill him?" He has a grandfathery tone to his voice, almost gentle, but it's stupid because how gentle can you be while debating killing the love of my life?

I think of Flynn's last words then my heart clenches, he's dead, and if I don't do something Nowl will be too. Be reckless, be rebeillious, he had said.

"I'll kill myself if you kill him, sir," I say simply, there's a long pause and it's like the room of medical personal has all held their breath, "and I do believe you need a victor."

Everyone stays silent, even Hallwe on the phone, finally he begins again, "I don't think you understand the position you have put me in, Ms. Bukater, there can't be two victors."

I make things up as I go along and thank God that it actually makes sense, "we can keep Nowl hidden, the world can think that he's dead." I have a strong tone in my voice that persuade even myself, "I can cry and act devasted for his death, and convince everyone that he is dead."

There's another pause and I'm impatient, "deal?"

"But where will he live?" It's a medical assissant, "everyone in two thinks he's dead, and so does everyone in all of Panem?"

I bit my lip, I hadn't thought of that.

"I can be an avox?" I whip my head around, Nowl has sat himself up weakly. I think of his words and let out an involuntary whimper that reminds me of a dog.

"I like that idea," Hallwe says.

"I don't," I snarl.

"Then please humour me with something better."

I blink. There isn't anything better. Where can a man everyone thinks is dead live? An avox makes sense, no one questions them. I rake my brain from something better but nothing comes to mind.

"District thirteen,"

The voice is of a woman's. She's not aboard the ship, but on the other end of the phone on Hallwe's side.

"District thirteen is gone," states the obvious medical assisstant again.

There's a pause, then Hallwe sighs, "he can live there, yes."

Then he hangs up, and all the six medical personal stare at each other. No one knows what to make of this, but I'm so happy that Nowl isn't dead or an avox I don't care. I turn to him again to hug him but he's past out again. A moment of panic grips me and I throw myself to the floor bedside him and put my head against his heart.

_Thump. Thump. Thump. _

I kiss his lips that don't kiss back. The doctors around me then start to heal us again. They inject a needle into me that I didn't see coming. It's not bad though, the woman medical assisstant promises me, it'll put me to sleep while I heal. Sleep sounds good, so I don't fight. Then before I close my eyes I look at them give Nowl the needle and as much as I don't trust them there's nothing I can do. He's safe and sound now, I try to tell myself. He'll live in district thirteen. Whatever that means. He's safe and sound. And then I fall asleep.


	29. Chapter 25: Watching the Games

I'm greeted with a hug. Mailis' arms are skinner than I remembered, it's like she herself was in the Hunger Games again along side me. She hugs me harder than anyone ever has before. I'm not suppose to see my mentor before the viewing ceremony but it's Mailis and she doesn't care for rules. She doesn't know about Nowl. No one but the head gamemakers, me, the medical crew aboard that hovercraft, and the woman's voice that saves his life does. And no one else can know.

She tell me of district thirteen and I don't believe her. She was the one that offered the suggestion of thirteen on the phone. A gamemakers wife who told me she listens in on her husband's conversations. She's a spy for this district, and has snuck into President Snow's mansion before. I try hard to believe her and hope she's true but it all just sounds so ludacrious.

I spend the next week in recovery at a Capitol hospital. There I'm completely reformed. My cuts and even scars all disappear with this stuff they put on me that hurts. My bullet wound that skimmed my arm leaves a tiny scar since it was worse than I thought it had been. Burned legs that had once been bright pink and hurt to move looked bran new, like someone had easily just ordered me new ones. I feel lucky to not have have too much lasting damage done in the game physically. Mentally, that's another story.

Here I am, on the edge of a hill, someone is calling me over the cliff, telling me I'll be okay, while another is calling me back to the safe land, but then they push me. I'm holding on now just by finger tips. That's how I feel, like I can just break any second.

They've kept Nowl in secluded recovery. The only people who treat his minor wounds as the ones that know about him. Even thought I can't see him the fact that he's alive makes everything worth it.

The viewing is today, where I sit on the couch infront of thousands of the Capitol and watch the highlights of the game I won. I try not to think of how this will be. How seeing my once strong beautiful alliance- my _friends_- die. Or how I will have to act like Nowl is dead alongside them.

After that week a woman comes in to lead me to my styling team. I forgot that I disliked this team. My head stylist, Paprika is nice, cheerful, and an amazing designer but she won't be in the room yet, not until they make me look pretty and not like a girl who had just won the Hunger Games.

They whine about my leg hair and tell me their favourite parts of the game. They loved the love triangle, one says, I ask what love triangle even though I know. Between Nowl, you, and Flynn. I shut them up by saying that it doesn't matter what shape it was because they're both dead. They style my long blonde hair into sultry loose curls and gush over how pretty I am, even when I was in the games. They keep complimenting me to make up for the love triangle remark and it only makes me dislike them more. Finally after they finish my makeup Paprika comes in.

She's holding a dress bag, and I feel excited to see it. I don't feel much lately so any emotion is nice to hold on to. She then disses my prep team and unzips the bag.

"I-It's beautiful," it's my turn to gush, but it's true. A white flowy dress that looks like clouds woven together.

"Thank you," she replies grimly, then after a pause says, "I'm so glad you live," a tear falls from her pretty face and she tries to smile, "you're the first one I've dressed to live."

I hug her, "that's because you turned me into a diamond alien and nothing can break a diamond," it's a sad excuse for a joke, but it's the closest I've come to making one in forever. She smiles bigger and helps me into my dress.

I feel so sad ever sense I left the games, numb. I still have to hold my emotions in, I'm not off camera yet.

Paprika mets up with her twin Paisley on the way down to the stage in which where I will be watching the games I just won. Paisley was Nowl's stylist, and I wish to console her, but I have to bite my lip. She looks sad but Nowl's life is at risk. If I tell anyone, or show any sign that he lives then they'll probably kill him.

She hugs me and I hug her back. Victory has been full of hugs.

We all walk and end up behind the same stage I had my interview on. My throat clenched and I blocked the thoughts of who I had kissed on this stage. It looks like the entire Capitol has shown up for this, all of them cheering. There's even big signs with my name everywhere. Pauper. Pauper. Pauper. It makes me think of popcorn, and how hungry I am not.

Rustun Flickerman, the host for the interview has changed his eyebrow colors to a startling cyan. He looks even older than before, which is saying something because I'm sure he's filled with botox. He's short and plump and doesn't look like he'll be getting up anytime soon from the white plush chair they have for him, across from an empty one where I will be. He's smiling to the audience and I can't help but think that this might be his last victors ceremony before they replace him with his son, Caesar.

There's a huge televison in the crowd for me to watch, and screens behind me so that the audience knows what I'm seeing. I can't help but this stage is too white and pure looking for a victor, but I'm glad that there's no red, I detest the colour red now that it's all I dream about.

They call me onto the stage and I try to smile and figure I looks more like a bulldog's face so I close my mouth. Rustun doesn't get up but extends his hand and I shake it.

"Ladies and gentalemen, let me reintroduce to you the victor of the fourty-first hunger games- Pauper Dea Bukater!" He may be old but his voice is still strong, and it amplifies over the speakers.

He compliments me, and I bulldog my face again. He then tells me that there's a surprise for me and I blink. Do they now about Nowl? But instead my district two team walks on stage. Well, Mailis runs, and I pretend like I haven't seen her in forever and stand up and run to her and give her the biggest footballer hug. Ako, the blue man greets me with a shy smile (he was never the outgoing type) and then they both go seat on special seats placed in the audience.

Without further adeu Rustun calls me back over and I sit down, "are you ready to relive the games, Paup?"

People must be worried about how much I've looked like a bullgod with this fake smile but I say, "ready as I'll ever be," and they start rolling the highlights.

It's like I'm watching a well made horror movie where I know the ending. They show me volunteering, the charoit rides, my interview where I kiss Flynn. I flinch at seeing our embrace, how could he be dead when that happened only more than a week ago? Then it's me entering the arena, a smile never forming on my lips. It shows the battle of the cornucopia where Flynn saves my life from Leek. It shows how tall gangly Libby dies, from an arrow to her heart. Then it's Char's death, and I couldn't help but think that for someone so quiet she was so brave.

I show up soon after her death to the house where it happened and I want to close my eyes. I murdered the boy who had just strangled Char, but I don't feel bad about it. The video makes me seem ruthless, I play with my food and laugh sarcastically with Leek, who acts like he's flirting right into my trap. I stab his knee first, flinch, then his heart. Blech. The movie includes a lot of shots of when Nowl and Flynn where an alliance.

This part's new to me, Flynn told me that him and Nowl didn't last long as an alliance because they had different stragtic ideas, which isn't a lie. But it's not the whole story. Nowl is bitter, he makes a lot of remarks about me being Flynn's girlfriend. Finally when they agree to leave each other it's because Flynn calls Nowl a jealous git, and Nowl tells him that he'd be a kiwi if he was a bird. The look in Nowl's eye when he walks away is that Flynn was right, he was jealous.

Then I met up Favian. His violet eyes look straight into the camera then seemingly into my soul. He tickles me and I annonce to the world how I plan to die in the games. I let out a laugh, I wish I had. I leave then hear a cannon and run right back. There's where Flynn gets stabbed.

The next ten minutes of clips give me the impression that the audience saw a love forming while I don't remember giving Flynn those looks that sad I loved him. When he was ingured I took care of him, and we laughed so much together. I press my lips together, knowing that I can never hear his laugh for real again.

A wall of fire breaks our romantic camp out. It seems to be the turning point for me and Flynn, because when I fall into the fire Flynn pulls me out and now it's Nowl who's helping me with my burns. I take first watch on our cabin that night and me and Nowl have our romantic moments. He wishes we'd have stayed together throughout the entire games. He tells me he has worried so much about me. I can't wait to see him, and part of me feels almost gibby knowing that Nowl is alive, but I cry.

To fool the world I cry.

This makes the audience murmur and point and some cry along side me. Everyone seems so sympathetic with me, they clearly shipped me and Nowl. But these tears aren't for Nowl because I know he's sade, they're for Flynn who isn't. He's now brought back to district twelve in a body box and his funeral may have just happened this moring. More tears come and I hate to look like a fool in front of all of these people but it's what they want to see. They love emotion and heartache. All I am to them is a really good reality tv show.

We then follow Flynn's arrow into Vail's heart and then both me and Nowl punch him him in the nose. Hard. I cry on the screen aswell as in this white chair. I know that this will only take a bit longer, then maybe I can visit Nowl? This ray of hope keeps me intact as Flynn leaves our alliance, and so does Electra.

Remus Night, who is-was actually an attractive guy- if you got past the creepy dark haunting mysterious pale look about him dies next. He's sad something wrong to Thailia about Leek, and she kills him. Favian runs away after seeing her death, and little does he know Thailia, who's rather stelth, is hot on his trail.

Oh look, here's me again. I hear footstops as I'm guarding the camp site and so I run to advert the preditor away from my allies. Then I smile and stupidly put down my sword. Can I close my eyes for this part? I try but they won't even blink. I see Electra's gun, then her beheading. Then there's Thailia and her blow gun which hits it's mark perfectly in the back of his brain. Then we smack together and we battle. Artemis comes in all too soon to save me.

I should have die then, I think. I came in here as sucicide and that would have been the perfect moment to have died. Saving Artemis. It would be my body sent back to my district, and someone else could have won. But then would Nowl be alive? He might have won this all on his own and not be shipped off to the hard to believe exists land of district thirteen.

Artemis dies soon after I think about saving her, and Hannah, the girl from district one saves then leaves me all too soon. Then comes another romantic part for me and Nowl, as I pour my heart out for him. I blush, which Rustun sees and says, "oh look, love lives on!" Then I cry because it does, but they can't know that.

Hannah dies the way I should have. She notices while sitting in a tree that she has come too close to winning, she says, "live for us," and eyes the camera she spotted, then jumps off the tree. I jump in my seat. Was she talking to the victor? Me?

I notice they choose not to show what happened in that cave my last night, but show us leaving the cave for the last time and saying our goodbyes.

Then the little girl comes. I want to tell myself to run and eventually I do. The water pours in all around me and I can remember how could it was. Flynn saves my life, for the bazillonth time in the Hunger Games and he kissed me, then I hear his goodbye again: "live your life, find love, be reckless, and rebellious, live for all of us whose died in here, okay Pauper? I know that your plan was to die but that's not going to happen! So live," his words are cut short and it shows him diving back into the water and a stunned look on my face. I knew what they left out, "and show the Capitol that we didn't die in vain."

And I promise myself now that he didn't. No one did. Not Char, nor Vail, Artemis, Electra, Libby, Dell, Leek, Thailia, Remus, Favian, Hannah, not all of those nameless people, or the ones I've already forgot their names, and defidently not Flynn Venustus.

Nowl dies in front of me again and this time the tears are fake. The audience is silent and I stand without being told to stand. I start living my life now, I won for all of these people who died for me. I won the Hunger Games, and no one else should have to win. So without further adeu, I flash the Capitol. I am now reckless, and rebellious. Now's my time to live my life.

And then someone shots me in the neck, and I see myself on the jumbo screen with a dart in my neck, then I fall of the stage into the audience.


	30. Epilogue

My hand finds his still cradled in mine, just as it had been before I fell asleep.

I spend minutes in the place where sleep has erased any troubles. Then he squeezes my hand and I know that I'm needed to wake up. I feel groggy but know that I have too.

Old age has hit me hard, and so jumping out of bed isn't an option. Thankfully I still look young despite being fifty-two.

I open my eyes and am staring back at the blonde man with speckles of gray in his hair. His wrinkled blue eyes crinkle at me, and I smile back.

I don't care for anything but breakfast and news, we get our sheduale together and then report to 8:00am breakfast.

Everyone's in complete anticipation, you can feel it in the air. Less than twentyfour hours ago a girl, our face of the rebeillion, Katniss entered into the Capitol and has now been reported alive. We're all waiting for news of the war. The ones with a family member in battle are the ones most tense.

That for me and my husband includes one of our sons, Kemp Flight. We eat toast and eggs and then I find myseld too stressed, so a wave of aniexty grips me. I get these often, my fork drops and egg lands on my gray uniform. I can't move a muscle and my brain always chooses a flash back and I feel like I'm alive in it again.

A dart in my neck, something I rarely relive is what I do now. After I'm darted the audience panicks. One kind Capitol man takes the dart from my neck and screams something, but I can't hear and I pass out. I now relive when I woke up back in the hospital, but this time I have a roomate. He's hooked up to wires and I'm amazed that he's alive. I try to move to hug him but I can't, I think that I'm paralized and there's nothing I can do but go back to sleep. The next time I wake up it's because a kiss has been placed on my forehead, and I move my hand to his. I'm so happy that I can move my hand that I cry and he worries and apologizes five thousand times like he always does which makes me cry harder. Then the spy woman comes in and tells me that I'm dead, which shocks me. But she explains that Panem thinks I'm dead, but they managed to save me before the poision that was in the dart spread. I will be shipped off to thirteen alongside Nowl. I hear my name being called and called and then I open my eyes.

I'm back in thirteen, old again. Nowl's hands are gripping my shoulders and I blink to remember where I am. The young girl across from me who has my eyes and her father's everything else looks at me like she's scared of me again.

"I'm okay, Rave," I whisper so quietly that I have to cough and repeat it again. She returns my smile which grants me hope.

In the same table as the three of us sits the rest of our family: Flynn Flight, who was blessed to look like a male version of me exchanges a look of worry to his older brother Zeb (short for Zebertian) who I am told looks identical to Nowl's mother because of his light brown hair. Valerie fixes her long braid- which has been as fashion statement here since the seventy-fourth Hunger Games- so that she can play with it and avoid this conversation. Yes, I have five kids, but with the absense of Kemp off at war our family isn't whole. We've all been a wreck, snapping at each other for stupid things.

Only my two youngest, Rave and Kemp live in the same compartement as me. Though now with the war Rave has been sleeping over at Valerie's for comfort. She likes to get away from mom's aniexty flashbacks, and dad's jumpiness that makes him attack someone if they make a noise too loud that scares him. I don't blame her, her parents are broken, but they were still able to raise a family well.

The cafeteria gets news: they're sending in medics to the city circle, the war should be over soon because they've conquered so much already. A person comes to our table and we all tense, he tells us that Kemp was awarded a metal but substained inguries while saving his ally from a raging fire.

The words raging fire almost brings me back to anixety land, back to the fourty-first Hunger Games, but Nowl's faster than that, "bird, our Kemp is okay, so sing a little tune!"

I laugh, and so do the people around my table who were eavesdropping. Everyone's used to Nowl forcing me to sing ever since we arrived here. So I do, I sing our birdcall which enters my mind so frequently with the war going on. It all just reminds me of the games.

Someone cuts the laughter that has sprouted from my song short, another military news man has ran into the room with wild, pain filled eyes. "The medics!" he shouted, and we all realize what's happened. "All bombed, but-but we _won_!"

It was such a bitter sweet moment. A woman with blonde hair who is Katniss' mother stands and walks silently out of the cafeteria. I want to follow her but I would feel like I'm intruding, and my mind's occupied at this moment.

There will be no more Hunger Games from now on. Flynn got his wish. The Capitol has been brought down, and if only I was the one who did it. But how could I have when I was dead? I have tried to many times and failed, and so recently when Peeta joined our party hijacked I've been the one teaching him what's real and what's not real. Since he has been sent into battle I hope that he's okay. I hope I've helped a bit.

For the first time in ever everything feels right. My son will be making it home alive, Peeta didn't kill Katniss, and there will be no more Hunger Games.

Everyone explodes in applause, I cry and kiss my husband. Imagine if I had died in the fourty-first annual Hunger Games? If my suicide plans went through. Or if I had changed my mind and not volunteered that one day thirty-five years ago. I wouldn't have my family, Nowl would have probably won alone and lived a sad life in district two. But what ifs aren't worth thinking about, because here we are, with the decisions we made, and the perfect life that has been created from it.

My name is Pauper Dea Flight, my husband is Nowl Flight. I went into the Hunger Games as suicide. I won the Hunger Games by accident. Panem thinks I'm dead. I am not dead. I have five kids. I live in district thirteen. I am fifty-two years old. I am a victor, mother, and I live for those who have died because of me.


End file.
